Like To Be You ✓

eighteen

^this is so funny tho???

o-o-o

I let the buzz of the afterparty die down before I make my move. On Thursday, when everybody is close to giving up on the week and only hang on in anticipation of the weekend, I post the invitation of the Halloween party. Then everybody is talking about it and not about how horrible their week was or how Jasper's party was 'cool af'.

"Dude." Mike Diaz stops me in the hallway when I'm on my way to recess. "You're finally throwing another party!"

"Yes." I say, and join the lunch line. He seems confused, probably by my lack of an enthusiastic answer, and awkwardly says, "Okay, cool." 

Later, during English, Zayne leans over my shoulder as I scroll through the school's tumblr page. I come to a stop after only two short scrolls at the long message we posted last night.

The Halloween Party you'll get but don't deserve
-hosted by Neil Graham and Zayne Sanchez

FAQ:

Why should we attend your party and not another *cool* jock's?
Ans. 1. Personal gaming pad? Check. 
2. Two hot tubs + a swimming pool? Check.
3. Diluted and processed C2H5OH? Check check check.  
4. Bonus: My music choice is good.
5. Bonus x2: There will be a performance by Desperate Measures
6. It's a Neil Graham Party.

Address?
Ans. Raniike Villa[no. 21], Cartier Street

Is there alcohol?
Ans. Read it from the beginning, doofus.

When is it?
Ans. On Halloween, duh.

What time does it start?
Ans. After 9

If I get too drunk, can I sleep in one of your many grand bedrooms?
Ans. No. Call an uber.

Can my girlfriend and I have sex in one of your rooms?
Ans. Absolutely not, Timothy.

*Everybody except David Mahajan is invited. Fuck you, David.

It's been liked 357 times and reposted 68 times, and a bunch of questions and comments have already plagued my notifications. I hand my phone to Zayne and say, "Do the honours." and he hands it back and says, "Oh hell no."

I sigh and pocket my phone. I'll get back to it when I'm not in the middle of another class. 

"... what can we gather from this dialogue?" Mrs Trahan says, holding up Macbeth. 

Then Mackenzie Esther shoots a hand up and launches into a speech and all I can comprehend are the words "tomorrow", "therefore", "tomorrow", "hence" , and "tomorrow".

Hell. This is hell.

x

It's Zayne's birthday today, which means I end up buying him a strawberry-flavoured cake with strawberry frosting and everything fucking strawberry on it. It's horrifying. 

I buy a blueberry cheesecake too, just for the sake of his sister, whose views on strawberry-flavoured stuff match mine. 

"That is disgusting." Esmeralda, his twelve-year old sister looks at Zayne licking his frosting-covered spoon like he's grown one-too many fingers on his head. 

"Shut up." Zayne says, the spoon still in his mouth. 

Esmeralda dramatically shudders, then gives me a sweet smile. "You're my hero." 

Zayne's parents stand to the side, huddled around the stove. Mr Sanchez, as usual, just watches his wife scurry around and occasionally hands her something when she needs it. 

"I love you, man." Zayne says, swallowing another huge bite of his cake. I try not to grimace. "I really do."

Esmeralda snaps the string of Zayne's birthday cap against his cheek and says, "Gaaaaaay."

Zayne hits her hand, and then they're fighting and Mrs Sanchez is angrily waving her spatula around, yelling at them to stop. Marinara sauce flies in the air, a bit of which lands on Mr Sanchez's nose and mustache, and he promptly licks it off.

Family. I've missed it.

x

In coding class, Mr Hayfield announces that the trip to the waterpark is back on. The class cheers. I glare at the computer screen.

My partner, a sci-fi geek named Andrew who likes Sharknado a bit too much than is healthy, says, "Dude, you have to come! It'll be awesome!" He nudges my arm three times. I keep myself in check and manage  to not hit his face.

During lunch, Zayne torments me into agreeing to go to the water park, and then and there, I decide that I need to kill him. He has too much power over me. The only person allowed to have power over me is my mother, whether I like it or not.

Speaking of my mother, she too becomes enthusiastic about the trip and readily signs the consent form and hands me the thirty dollars fee inclusive of food, which I'm sure is going to taste like chlorine and cardboard.

"It'll be fun, Neil!" she says as she rummages through my drawer for a pair of decent swimming shorts. She removes a pair of blue ones with a floral pattern on them. "These look good!"

"Oh God, Mom, no."

She frowns at me. "What's wrong with them?"

"We're going to Aqualand, Mom. Not Hawaii." Then I put a finger to my chin. "You know, we could actually go there during Thanksgiving break."

"No." My mother says. "We're going to Grandma's. You know how long it's been."

I raise a brow. "Is Grandpa still as grumpy?"

My mother laughs. "Even more."

I sigh. "Fun!"

"Hey, Tyler will be there. Doesn't that make you happy?"

"What?" I say too loudly before realisation dawns.

"Tyler?" My mother looks at me with confusion. "Aunt Kate's labrador?"

"Yeah, yeah." I scratch my neck and take the black board shorts my mom holds. "These should work."

  x

On Monday morning, my mother looks grim. When I ask her what happened, she tells me that Jennifer Chen died.

It was in a car accident while she was on her way to work, according to the police. Witnesses reported her calling out for help through her smashed window. She died on the way to the hospital.

I feel a weight on my chest that doesn't seem to lift no matter what. I feel guilty, because I was an asshole to her when she only tried to help me. I feel angry, because she didn't deserve it. I feel sad, because her three children are now motherless. All because of a drunk girl who couldn't call a cab and decided that she was "sober enough" to drive.

I don't touch my car keys at all during the week. Instead, my mother drives.

o-o-o

a/n

don't drink and drive, kiddos!