(Bulimia)
You sat in the restaurant with Zayn and his parents with only a small salad in front of you. Regardless of its size though, you had to get rid of it. You just didn’t want everyone to get suspicious so you would just have to wait until you had a moment. The dinner was actually quite nice. You got to know Zayn’s mum pretty well and his dad seemed to be taking a liking to you as well. Nobody seemed to notice that you were only picking at the small salad. You don’t know how, but you managed to eat the whole thing. You felt extremely guilty and needed to get rid of it as soon as possible.
“Excuse me, I have to use the washroom.” Without another word, you slipped away into the empty bathroom.
You went into the first stall available, locking the door and immediately shoving your fingers down your throat. It didn’t take much time for your gag reflex to react and you were throwing up the small amount of food you had accidentally eaten. You kept sticking your fingers down your throat until you were getting dizzy and there was nothing left to dispose. You used the stall walls to steady yourself before flushing your stomach contents down. You left the stall, washing your hands and rinsing your mouth out the best you could.
You had hoped you weren’t gone long enough to make them wonder why you were gone so long. You shakily walked back to the table and sat down. Zayn gave you a concerned look but you shook it off. For about another half an hour, the four of you chatted about different topics until Zayn announced that both of you had to go home. Both of you exchanged hugs with his parents and started the walk to your car.
“Are you feeling okay boo? You were in the bathroom for a while,” he observed as you walked down the sidewalk.
“Yeah, I feel fine,” you answered, avoiding eye contact with him.
“(Y/N), you’re extremely pale…”
“I said I’m fine Zayn!” you snapped, immediately feeling bad after. “Sorry… sorry…”
“Don’t apologize… But babe, you’re not okay, we can both see that. You don’t have to hide anything from me… Besides, I think I might have an idea…” You looked up at him, panic and curiosity written across your features. “Now, don’t get mad if I’m wrong… but, (Y/N), have you been making yourself throw up?” Hurt spread across his face as if he feared the worst and you were about to confirm his fears.
You nodded your head up and down, looking towards the ground, not wanting to see the look on Zayn’s face. “I’m so sorry.” You felt yourself start to tear up. “Zayn, I’m so sorry… it’s just all the rumors going around… I can’t bring myself to stop. And then I couldn’t tell you because I thought you would judge me like everyone else-” He interrupted you.
“(Y/N), stop… If you think I would judge you, you are so wrong. I know the rumors hurt baby… I want them to stop and I’m trying. But most of all I want you to stop this. This isn’t healthy babe… I can’t lose you (Y/N) and I won’t this problem come between us. We are going to work together to get you better. You are my perfect boo. You are so beautiful and I can’t even begin to explain all the reason why I love you.”
You wrapped your arms around his waist and buried yourself in his embrace. “I love you so much Zayn.”
From this moment on, you were going to have Zayn by your side through the good and the bad. There was nothing you had to hide from him, he accepted you for you and that was all your heart needed to believe.
