hopeless

177 3 2
                                    


id been here for 4 weeks now

no one wondered where i was 

jake didnt even care, i hadnt been in la for a month and he hadnt even done a news report to try and find me

i had lost all sense of love, all sense of hope, all sense of happiness, all sense of stability, all sense of hope, all sense of success, all sense of life

my depreshiun was getting really bad 

i cant drown my deamons they no how too swim

i felt like a swan, serene on the top, but panicking under the surface

'Y/N GET UP U SLOOTE'

my mum did this everyday, she made me go to the shop to buy her drooges and cigirites. i had to wear a disguise so no one recognised me. my mum wanted me to stay with her forever, and i could never leeve to go back to la because then there wouldnt be anhyone to buy her cigggirites. 

i stepped out of the house, fresh air whacking me in my cheeks and whipping around my long, wavey, ombre hair

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

i stepped out of the house, fresh air whacking me in my cheeks and whipping around my long, wavey, ombre hair. i was wearing leggings and a pink sweatshirt, with my adidas shoes. a pretty normal outfit so that no one would notice anyhting out of the ordinary. this is what i was wearing.

 this is what i was wearing

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

i walked to the shop. it only took 20 mins or so. i thought about jake the whole time, how he was happier with alissa and how he never loved me adn how he and logan BOTH used me for views. it made me so sad bc i had no one. 

but then i thought

i was out. and no one was there watching me. i should run away. 

i ran rly fast down the road. i had no where to go, i just ran.

 i had no where to go, i just ran

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.


i had no where to go. i sat in starbucCks and thought of how to get back to LA. but then i ahd no one there either. maybe i should go to somewhere cute like paris and get a freash start. i was fluent in french after all. i was drinking my pinkity drinkity and thinkity about how i could getity to a new countrity. 

then i felt a hand on my shoulder, someone grabbed me, and put a cloth over my mouth. 

'y/n i knew i would find you here, wasting my money'

i felt dizzy

and everything went blacck. 



i woke up, 4 brown walls with peeling paint and mould on them

I WAS BACK HERE?? ASFTER I ESCAPED??? HOW DID SHE FIND ME???

there was no point to life anymore. i closed my eyes. 

everything went blacck. 


merch link in bio - readerxjakepaulWhere stories live. Discover now