Once again I got a messaged bur this time I was mean I told him he hurt me , he responded with things such as I didn't mean to I just don't want you to hurt me, or things like I'm not ready yet so we began talking even told me I was cleaning one of my not so favourite hobbies to which he told me he couldn't be assed... could of hours later I recived a message saying. You inspired me I've taken 6 bags of rubbish may need my sister help on my man draw and his daughter to sort her room out but he did something and I felt good as I had inspired him. He ended calling me drank a few times. Which ended very bad.... because he would say things I wanted to hear but not mean them.. he told I deserve better and he couldn't give me anything but the truth was I didn't want anything expect him.. we wold laugh about our intrested in TV series and music. And find guilty pleasure.. I think the best was when he showed me buff the musical.. I was just so happy when I was around him, he would grin so that he teeth were exposed nor that he smiled very often, when out. He did talk about him when we were having long conversations I tried to make him understand from my experiences but they were brushed away it didn't bother me, few times I gave him money and tobacco. Just so I knew he was okay. I dunno there was just something so irristable about him. It was like once I got a little bit I needed more pieces. He got really down and told me why do I bother or could I really see myself with him, I told even know it sounded creepy and weird that yeah... I dreamt about him and wanted to marry him and get a house and do coupley things.. he said you really see that, and as stupid as I am I said yes. He kept allogising for not being good enough or not having money to take me on a date or get me coffee so we arranged on a Tuesday morning I'd have coffee and we talk again I went to sleep overly excited even though he had let me down many times before... so I got up early got dressed put makeup on and got a bus to town I sat in a coffee shop and I messaged and messaged no answer so I had to leave when I got back oh look more allogise he said he didn't hear his alarm, I was so mad I just said if you didn't want to go you could of said he said I'm not lying I really did I'm not making excuses..
YOU ARE READING
grief is my friend.
Non-FictionThe it might take me a while as we both grief can be a long term friend or I'm other cases an enemy. I just pure ever bit I had left into this. Who really dies the soul or the shatters of my heart. I'm evening willing to let you. Grief became me
