Rant Book

what did I do, i just don't understand

a chapter in my life that has lasted 4 years I  thought was coming to a close, but I feels like a never ending loop...

god, what have I done, to be taunted and punished like this?

why must I be punished for nothing?

I thought this was over, I thought I might get a sense of relief but here I am yet again..

I wish this was over!

 I feel like im fighting a losing battle.

a never ending losing battle.

4 damn years of growing up that no matter how hard I wish im never gonna get back, 4 years of great memories I could've had, but I get none of that,  no Hugs, No family get togethers, no sleepovers.

nothing.

most people say god has a reason for everything

what I wanna know is the reason why the entire situation happened.

Why my aunt turned into the biggest slut ever, packed up her bags and her kids and left everything she ever knew for a guy she never turned her damn head for in high school.

why god? why

why did you turn my aunt into a bitch?

why did you make her a bed hopper?

why?

I keep asking myself, what have I done?

"this is all your fault"

 the more her words sink into my head the more I believe it

the more I believe this is all my fault, the more I cry.

i just don't want this anymore

the constant worry of losing contact with my cousins, cause she could have a bipolar bitchfit and block our number on my cousins phones.

im the stronger one in the situation.

im the one who needs to resolve this but i don't know how.

i never want to talk to her again

this has lasted from October 27th of my 7th grade year to my mid 9th grade year and ive had enough.

i just wish this was over..

i wish i could do something to bring them home as soon as possible

i just want them home safe instead of a 37-40 hour drive i want them to be 30 mins away like they used too.

turn the page god..

im ready for something new.

if life is a book when does this chapter end?

please god help me to figure out what i did to cause this...

amber...