distance

-nerve-wracking, breathtaking-

[29.01.18]

All the beauty the universe holds, the brightness of these billion stars and the galactic mysteries above us is the beauty that lies to your visage to to the deepest bottom of your soul. You may not believe it but I've got the eyes of a soul that gets intrigued with that face and demeanor of yours that just kept me falling and falling in somewhat place I am not sure of. But as long as I'm with you, I don't even think twice about the things I do. You are always breathtaking in my point of view and nothing and no one can alter my belief, for you are the panorama I always desired to seek.

And the beating of my heart filled with yearning and melancholy with my mind supplying the possible scenarios and what-ifs as we interlock our gazes together, inches apart and lips pressed together; so quiet, so loud. That after all the months of erasing you inside my head, the restrained wants to conversing with you, and the question that bugged me late at night kept coming back to me, the "I'll move on from you," sentence were just a bunch of words for determination in halting these emotions I feel for you.

It is nerve-wracking, when we accidentally touch at certain ares we usually do, like my skin holding a hot pot, flinching at the contact and avoiding the feeling of the fire you've sent ablaze in my heart and left for it to die down, yet there's still a little flame that only you can turn off. But we barely interact, small conversations and awkwardness is the tension we're at when we're together. More and more of stealing of glances and catching one another's eyes. Almost caught red-handed but we're in a flash when we turn our heads to different directions and look again when the other is focused on something else.

Like two magnetic poles pulling and pushing each other till it gets tired, but pride gets in the way and continue once again till one just loses it.

And despite the occurrences we've gone thru, the right time will come, and at that moment our hearts be filled with slight joy and contentment that we've finally answered each other's undying questions and know the whole truth. I know it'll be hard to do so but you cannot and never will feel the ease of it unless you be brave enough and take action to the thoughts you want to execute to life.

We wait and we wait. For the courage to kick in, and maybe then we'll feel better together. And maybe things would turn out different—in the acceptable scenario we created inside our heads.