silence
silence use to be so hard to keep. it use to feel like when the monitor at a hospital screams that someone just died. if silence was creeping in i use to wonder around my house finding people to bug until i gave up and just played pretend in my room. i dont know how many spirits i must have been keeping company. i was filling their silence. growing up i would hear people correlate silence with peace. because i always felt my life was more on the chaotic side, something always happening, i wanted that peaceful silence. it didnt dawn on me that those two were never supposed to mesh. never supposed to be put in the same meaning. you want peace, but not silence. silence is an icee hand that drags you along till you develop stockholm syndrome. then it drops you with no recollection of how you got there. all you know is your own voice feels foreign and you would rather it not come out of your mouth. all you know is being an ear for those around you. all you know is other voices sounding like independence day trying to ignite your fuse again but the booms give you shell shock almost. all you know is silence and the peacefulness it brings you.
a/n
today was alright till about 5 o'clock i dont know why. my head just hurts now from crying for two hours earlier.
YOU ARE READING
dear nobody
Poetryheres to the things we will all never say, or are too embarrassed to
