Whirlwind Cybermance

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D A Y  O N E : 

Nervousness fuels the anticipation in your veins. 

You're excited, you're intrigued, you're giddy. 

It takes you time to send that first message, to put down your phone and distract yourself with something else while you wait for that reply. 

But it's really nothing compared to what you'll face in two more weeks, because right now, there's nothing to lose. 

Sure, a little bit of dignity here and a bit of self-esteem there, but that'll be replenished within a few weeks, so you don't worry. 

You have to think before you type, then rethink before you send, then have a heart attack once it has sent. 

Until you get a reply and your confidence boosts a little too much.

You talk for hours, only a few minutes between each reply because you're eager to investigate,

 to find that spark and feel that click, 

but you don't want to seem desperate, so you leave enough time between you receiving the message and opening it, 

because you obviously don't want to seem like you're waiting for that message, 


do you?


D A Y  T H R E E : 

They've officially overtaken your mind. 

You see something funny on your feed?

 Tag them. 

Looking fly as heck in a selfie you just took? 

You send that. 

Do something silly with your friends? 

Post it and wait for them to like it. 

You're always thinking about what they'll think, about if they would like this; about them, in general. 

Slowly, but surely, they overtake your older friends, you talk to them more, you see more photos of them, you try to catch up with them more. 

But guess what? You're constantly, back and forth, back and forth. 

It's a wonder neither of you have gotten fired yet because you're on your phone that much talking to them. 

No longer do the 'bathroom breaks' and sneaky under the table snaps work because you just don't want to look away.   


D A Y  S E V E N :

You're in love. 

Oh lord, you're so in love... with what you know. 

You've only now realised that you really don't know them. 

Sure, you know what they were doing last night and the most annoying coworker they have, but there isn't really much else other than the present. 

And while it's important to know what happens in the now, it's what led them to where they are that's most important. 

But, it's too early on to ask that now right? 

You guys are just casually snapping, texting here and there and maybe even a phone call if you're feeling courageous enough. 


D A Y  T W E L V E : 

It's slowing down. 

You can already tell. 

You have to force conversation and seeing that they've read the message and aren't replying just sucks

Instantly ruins any semblance of a good mood you had. 

You try talking to your other friends to distract yourself but you just can't stop yourself from thinking of them. 

Their name pops up in your head all the time and when you see that first notification, you just want to jump in and hold onto the conversation as hard as you can. 

But no, they hurt you, so you should give them the same treatment... leave them waiting for a little bit. 

But six minutes later you're opening the message to find out that it's just a dismissive reply to a question you asked hours ago. 

And guess what?

It fucking hurts.


D A Y  S I X T E E N :

It's done. 

You occasionally check in on them, but you always get the same answer. 

You've tried hanging out, even in a group, but they're always busy. 

You scroll past their contact sometimes and laugh to yourself knowing you wasted naive time on someone who hardly appreciated you after the first week. 

Three weeks is the extent of a "whirlwind cybermance" and as you steadily approach that, you can't help but scoff knowing it's happened so many times before, and yet you still fell for it.

It still fucking hurts, more so because you did it again. 


A/N:

H O N O U R A B L E  M E N T I O N S 

K I A R A 

M A S E 

Thank you to those who have shown support for this book already, it means the world and more that you already believe in my crappy writing and sappy romantic ideals of the world <3

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