Life

Search Me God

 We got back and showered. I finished getting ready for the day, which takes me like ten minutes because I pretty much brush my hair and teeth, get dressed and wash my face. No makeup or special routine, just the basics. I walk downstairs to see Jessalyn sitting on the couch, reading.

 "Hi Jessalyn."

 "Oh, hi Em. Come sit here, I want to explain something else to you now," Jessalyn said motioning me to come sit beside her on the couch. I walked over slowly and sat on the other side of the couch, facing her.

 "Another thing that we do here at camp is have devotions everyday in the morning. This is going to start for you too. I'm not going to be supervising you at all. I'll be in here doing my own devos and you can do them wherever you would like. Outside, inside, it doesn't matter as long as the weather is good." Jessalyn explained to me. I nodded and headed to our room to grab my new bible, a notebook and a couple pens. I headed outside and found a tree to sit under. I opened my bible and stared blankly at the pages. I had no idea where to start. I flipped around, trying to find a spot that grabbed my attention. Nothing. My brain was starting to panic. Jessalyn said that I should do this but I can't even find a place to read! I started to cry and ask God why I couldn't just do my devotions. 

 Suddenly a verse reference popped into my head. Psalm 139:23-24. I quickly flipped through the pages till I found it. "Search me oh God and know my heart; know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139:23-24. I thought about this for a while. This verse seemed like it was written just for me. I then started to read it over and over again. By the time I had gotten back inside, that verse was permanently ingrained in my mind. I wanted to make it my prayer to God every morning. 

 The morning flew by with getting my school work in order and ready to go. Soon it was time to have lunch. At camp we all eat together for lunch in the dining hall or outside when the weather is nice. That day we ate outside at the picnic tables. All the staff members were there and I knew most of them, but I stayed close to Jessalyn and Taylor. I'm not a huge social person and talking in larger groups is hard for me to do. Jessalyn, Taylor and I sat with the camp director, his wife, the ministry director Tim, his wife and their two kids. Their daughter looked about the same age as me. She had black hair and brown eyes. She was quite tall and wore jean shorts and a t-shirt. 

 "Hi. I'm Harper. What's your name?" She said.

 "I'm Emery," I answered, not making eye contact. 

 "Oh yeah, you're living with Jessalyn and Taylor right?"

 "Yeah I am." This girl, Harper was nice, but I wasn't totally sure if I trusted her. She was really bubbly and outgoing. She seemed like a friend for me. Maybe I could have a friend my age that was not just working at camp with me but pretty much living with me. Someone who didn't know me before this past year. I thought about her the whole lunch while we sat across from each other content to sit in silence. When we left to go back to shalom for the afternoon, I could only think about Harper. My new friend.