Don't Forget About Me (Lovely Sequel)

Chapter Twenty Three - Alena's P.O.V

Chapter Twenty Three - Alena's P.O.V

    First day back at work. Despite my anxiety and anticipation towards an overwhelming day, it has been far from so. I am incredibly bored, actually. It feels as if I was never even gone.

    Truthfully, maybe I'm not happy with my job. And considering my time and money invested in my education, that's disappointing. Maybe it's time I start rethinking what I do.

    I like my work community. Ohio State's campus is beautiful, and I make good enough money and get good benefits. I'm just not happy. Nothing about this is exciting to me anymore. What happened?

    "You deserve to have fun Alena. You deserve to be happy." Josh's words circle around my head. "Just think about it, where do you see yourself on your thirtieth birthday? With Derrick in your big fancy house and possibly a kid and a luxury life or with Tyler possibly on the road or maybe back in the little home in Columbus? Where do you want to wake up in four years?" Well, I guess the first part of his sentiment was more helpful right now than the remainder, which left me with decisions on my plate regarding more than just my career.

    Honestly, I'm unhappy. I think I have been for a while.

    Sure, I have my moments of happiness. I have slivers of time that make me glow and delude me into thinking that everything is fine. Each happy moment holds me over long enough that I'm distracted, I suppose.

    Until now. Now, I am staring into the abyss of it all. Sitting at this empty desk; a desk with no tasks, no purpose at all. At the edge, it is lined with my office phone, sticky notes, my name plate, and a photo of Derrick and I from our engagement. I reach over and pick up the frame, bringing it closer to me. This girl looks happy, I think to myself, but that girl isn't me anymore. Truthfully, I am struggling to remember the last time that I felt the joy that I did in this photo. Even looking at it now, such joy is failed to be rekindled.

    So here I am. An empty desk, a hallow shell. Nothing of purpose left for me. I am unhappy.

    Without thinking, I push out my swivel chair and stand up to leave my office. From the supply closet down the hall, I take a cardboard file box and bring it back to my office with me. After assembling it, I begin to fill it with my belongings, starting with Derrick and I's engagement photo.

    From there, every highlighter, pen, sticky note, file, you name it, got piled in my box, until it was filled to the top. Even with all of these things inside, my desk was empty. It is no more empty now without all of it than it was before.

    Leaving the box on my desk, I then leave my office again, walking upstairs to see my boss.

    What are you doing Alena? You're going to regret this...

    I shake the voices of doubt from my head, and knock on her door. A kind, "Come in!" chimes from behind her door. Slowly, I take a deep breath and open her door.

-

    "Alena, where is this coming from? You've been working with us since you graduated. Are you unhappy? Is there something that we can do to make this better for you?"

    Yes, I'm so unhappy. No, there's nothing that you can do to fix it. My God, I'm bored. I'm so bored. I've been doing the same thing every day for years. Living this mundane life and doing this job that I don't even really enjoy. What do you suppose you can do about that?

    "I think it's exactly that, Beth. I've just been doing this for so long, and this isn't what I want for my life. I think I need to try something new and find a different path. I'm so sorry that this is coming out of nowhere." I responded, wearily.