Don't Forget About Me (Lovely Sequel)

Chapter Thirty Six - Alena's P.O.V

Chapter Thirty Six - Alena's P.O.V

It felt like I was a teenager all over again; pacing around my room waiting for Tyler to come ring the doorbell. Although, I guess this was different cause usually I was the one picking him up.

Still, my jitters were the same. Why was I so nervous? Perhaps because several weeks ago, I gave up my old life for what my heart was telling me was the right path. The thought of it having falsely guided me made me sick to my stomach.

Regardless, I guess the past few weeks have been good for me. I'm interviewing for a new job, and although I'm staying with my parents, I feel the most independent that I have since college. Leaving Derrick has been hard. We were still in contact, trying to find a new normal for us. He had just found a new place, and the house was on the market. Some days, I woke up and missed him. I missed waking up in our bed, next to him, in his arms. Especially being back in my childhood home. I certainly was not the same designer as I was in high school, but my style would have to remain compromised for the time being as I stayed in my high school oasis.

My thoughts were interrupted by the doorbell ringing. I grabbed my purse and went trampling down the stairs, throwing on my coat and rushing to beat my parents to the door. I opened it to Tyler, illuminated by the outdoor light in the dark night. Our eyes met and we smiled, neither of us able to think of the right words. I stepped outside and closed the door behind me, quickly realizing how close Tyler and I were standing to each other then. After zipping up my coat, I gave him another smile. "Ready to go?" He asked, and I wanted to laugh, but not in a mean way. Rather in a, "Wow I missed your goofiness" kind of way.

I nodded and followed him to the car. He opened the passenger side door for me, which again made me giggle at how much things have changed. After I stepped in and got comfortable, he closed the door and ran around the car to his own side, quickly climbing in and starting the car.

Within a few minutes, I had a hunch about where he was taking me. It proved to be right when Tyler pulled in and parked at Refectory.

"Tyler, I'm not nearly dressed for this place..."

"That doesn't matter, you look beautiful." He looked across the car at me and we both just looked into each other's eyes for a moment; long enough for it to be a moment but not so long that it felt weird. I could've leaned over the center console and kissed him then and there, but I held back.

"Thank you," I smiled into my lap, "Don't worry about the door, I've got it." I reached over and opened my door, both of us stepping out of the car at the same time.

When we walked in, we were brought to a table that gave me a view I had seen before. "Wow Tyler, you even got it down to the table? I can't believe that you remembered this." I got comfortable at my seat and folded my napkin over my lap as I spoke.

"Our first date, I would never forget it. I tried to be as descriptive as possible to the guy over the phone when I made this reservation, I can't believe that he actually understood which table I was talking about."

We were quickly served everything we had ordered, and left to enjoy the magic of the evening. That was, until I remembered why it was I asked for him to see me. What needed to be said, and, what could possibly ruin that magic.

"Thank you for this Tyler, this is truly such a beautiful night." I took a sip of courage from my glass and continued. "I wanted to see you and talk about some of the things that I just didn't feel right saying on the phone."

"Okay, I'm here to listen." He set down his silverware and looked attentively at me from across the table, like a little boy looking up at his teacher in the front of the classroom, preparing himself for what at the time felt like complex math equations to be written on the board for him to solve.

"I went back and forth about telling you all of this, because maybe I don't really need to, but I just feel like I need to be honest with someone about everything that happened." After a deep breath, I carried on, "After coming home from being on tour with you, a few weeks later, I found out that I was pregnant." I watched his face stay neutral, but his eyes shift. I continued still. "I didn't say anything because I didn't want to act until I knew anything for sure. I had to know before I made an even bigger mess... one that I couldn't cover up and hide anymore. Before I could, though, I lost the baby. Impact and trauma, had to go to the hospital. I was okay, obviously, but the baby didn't make it. I left Derrick the next day."

"Did you tell him?" Was the first thing he could ask.

"No, I couldn't. Who was I to burden him with anything more? I had already asked him to uproot his life and change his entire plan just because I didn't want it anymore. I couldn't make it harder than it already was."

"So, why tell me?" He looked so lost, sad, dumbfounded.

"Because, I'm very confident that even though I didn't make it to that appointment to take a paternity test, you were the father." A tear rolled down my check, reminded again of what I - what we had lost. I wiped it away on the back of my hand, and Tyler reached across the table for my other one. He squeezed it tightly.

"I'm so sorry Alena, it was unfair of me to put you through all of that, and alone, too."

"It's not your fault Tyler, or at least not just yours. I'm just as much to blame, we both agreed to do what we did that night. We couldn't change that."

"I'm sure now that you wish you could," Tyler said, his voice regretful and almost tragic. The lightness and beauty of the night in the air had officially vanished. "You had wanted to take it back immediately after, but I can only imagine now how you feel."

"I wouldn't Ty, I wouldn't change a thing." I smiled through my slow-falling tears at the memory. "It shook my entire world, yes, but without it, I don't think I would have ever realized what was right in front of me that entire time." I looked across at him and into his troubled eyes, "That I needed to be with you like I need air in my lungs to breathe. I didn't need a baby, born or unborn, to tell me that. I knew it in my heart all along."

"Alena, I'm so sorry that I put you through that alone. I cannot believe that after everything that you had been through, I had no idea."

"I didn't want you to know Tyler, you don't have to be sorry. There is nothing to apologize for and nothing that can be changed. Nothing except our future, that is, and I want to start spending that with you."

He finally smiled at me, like the same dork that had looked at me from across this table eight years ago. "I would like that." This time, I squeezed his hand tighter. "How is it that after all this time, I still feel like you know me at my core? Like you know my soul better than anyone else?"