Death and the Deeds ✔

LIVING IT AGAIN

On the morning of 13th, my alarm clock went off like it was signalling for a storm. As if to make sure everyone not only woke up, but also got on their feet to fight whatever stood in the way. Maybe it knew today was one of those days I was not ready to face the fate and would do anything to not live it.

  I needed a few more hours of blackness. Not to sleep, but to prepare, to pour my thoughts out onto a page, reorganize, prioritize and pack them back in again. But slashing through the curtains, I realized the sun was up, throwing it's golden rays that were sinking in my body.

"Mom I'll walk to school today." I said as I gulped down the last sip of banana shake and grabbed the sandwiches she prepared for me.

Her glare was enough to make me wish for Laura to appear at that very moment.

"Why?"

"Because umm.. I don't feel like taking the bus."

"I can drop you."

"By bus I meant anything with an engine and requires a key to start."

Her eyes narrowed in suspicion and before she could say further, I stepped out.

I took small rapid steps like a tiger's walk to his prey. The morning view from the window was deceptive. Outside, it felt like the city died the last night. Deserted. I could barely hear any birds. Any motion caused a noise unable to make it go unnoticed. I was soon out of breath which only made me me realize I have the stamina of an old lady. 

"Take me to the police station." I stated as I seated inside a cab.

As he drove, we passed through the place that was once so foreign but now it had become my personal hell.  Intense feelings cage me up as my mind became eerily silent like it did the day of that accident. Images of that one particular scene going round and round in my mind as I shook my head to clear my mind off. But my mind was like madhouse. And sanity's a curse word in a madhouse. 

"Mam? You okay?" Suddenly the driver's voice brought me back to Earth.

"Yes." I cleared my throat. I looked outside the glass and realized we were at the police station. "How much?" I asked.

Entering the station, my heartbeats went out of rhythm. I had to make sure Mason's father does not see me. I knew a friend of him who might be my only card in the game I could not loose.

"Mr. Benjumin?" I knocked on his office's door that widely opened as he was busy reading what I suppose was some case file.

"Yes?" He looked up and gave his almost falling glasses a push.

  "Hi! I'm Hazel. May I speak to you for a minute?"

He gestured towards the chair in front of his table.

"I want you to believe everything I say." I continued. "Tomorrow someone's going to attack Mr Arlo at his house." I clasped and unclasped my hands as the anxiety took over me like I was it's favorite personal thing. 

"What?"  He took his glasses off.

"I know. It's hard to believe like how do I even know all this for sure but I do and you must believe me or we'd never know who did this. We don't have much time and if..."

"Stop stop stop." He interrupted and tapped on the tables gently thrice. "Breathe. Carter!" He shouted and a young man appeared. "Get us some water." He ordered.

  I turned down food but accepted the glass of water which I took tiny sips of. I did not want to chew on my nails or lips, so I found myself gnawing on the inside of my cheek.

"Mr Ben please you must trust me in this matter." He nodded.

"First thing's first, how do you know?" He leaned back on his chair.

Because I died and now I'm back alive. Surprise.

"I just know." Well played Hazel. No one would have a slightest doubt on you.

"You just know? Like you're some sort of a wizard hiding his powers?" He snorted.

Exactly. I can tell you never got promoted because you could not find who murdered Mr Arlo.

"Please. Send some people around 5 tomorrow at his house. Trust me. You don't want to regret this."

"How do I not believe that you're not a part of it if something happens. How do I make sure you're not on the other side of the fence."

"What? How can I be a part of something like this?" I frowned.

"I don't know. Like how I don't know how you're so sure." He looked at me as if I was a criminal.

I clearly did not think this through. I felt like I was drowning in the air. I never realized how infuriating it is when you are telling nothing but the truth and yet you get accused of lying. Or worse. Betraying. 

"My men will be there tomorrow in a hideout. If something happens, it'll be handled. If nothing happens, you'll be handled." He took out a cigarette and brought the paper weapon to life with a lighter. 

"Thank you for your time." I said as I got up.

He just nodded as he inhaled deeply and then I saw grey smoke curling in the air.

 It was only 5 past ten but my mind was exhausted. There is this kind of tired where you take a nap, drink a glass of water and you are good to go. And then there is another kind where you need an hour long warm bath and whole night sleep. I was the second type of tired. 

"Why are you back?" Mom did not even let me put my bag down.

"Because I got tired of walking. And from the point where I got tired, home was closer than school. Hence I made the wise decision." I curled both of my lips inwards.

"Are you okay honey? You don't have fever, do you?" She placed her hand on my forehead.

"Yes I think I might be catching those germs." I faked a sigh.

"Go rest you drama." 

I laughed and hugged her. 

Sometime at night, I woke up with a jerk.  Slowly and reluctantly, I uncovered my face. I blink, close my eyes, and blink again. I checked the time. 8:03 PM. I called Mason.

Mason: Hey!

Me: Hi. What are you doing?

Mason: I'm in my room. Why whatsup?

Me: And where is your dad?

Mason: Probably in his study why?

Me: Nothing just go sit with him.

Mason: Are you okay?

Me: I am. Please go sit and talk to him.

Mason: Okay I will.

Me: Bye. 

I then went downstairs to fill up my empty stomach that was now growling so hard that it seemed as if it was eating its own self. 

The next day, I got a call for Mr. Ben and he briefed me about the plan. I called Mason like I did the last time and around 5 I went to his house. I had the same conversation with Mr. Arlo and then I went upstairs. I sat down at one corner with my knees curled up in between my arms.

  I felt it break. Like a crystal vase falling onto a marble floor my last shred of strength shatters into a million pieces. There is no hope in putting them back together so I don't even try. I just laid there staring into an empty wall ,  "I'm done." I whispered to myself. I've reached my limit and now I'm just done.