Sometimes When We Touch
Miles didn't seem to mind not having someone to share the nights. He was simply happy making music with his band, hanging out with mates and helping his mum in the shop.
"...no, not at all." Miles was smiling the first time Alex mentioned it, asking if he'd feel lonely sometimes. His eyes were the shade of charm and mystery, fixed on Alex's furrowed face. Miles gestured vaguely between them, fingers dancing in the warm breeze of Merseyside summer. "I'm loving this."
It took a long time for Alex to understand that Miles was not just talking about any specific afternoons they spent in his room, listening to the records Miles got at home. It scared him the moment Alex figured it out — It was the third night of the two bands touring together again. Everyone was having a laugh in the party, catching up. Miles went out for a fag as the day was about to end. When Alex followed him to the alley, he found Miles leaning on the brick wall beside the door, shoulder and torso relaxed in the freezing air. They had kept in touch, talking with each other pretty often and Miles even came down to the studio to play guitar on one of the songs for the monkeys' new album. There was not too much to update. But Alex always found it nice to see Miles in person. The room was forever an exciting and happy place when Miles was in it.
"Al!" His eyes lit up when Alex approached him for a light.
Miles giggled as Alex failed to flick the lighter. "Here you go babe." Miles said in that flirting tone of his when he wanted to embarrass Alex. He leaned in and let his cigarette touch Alex's unlit one, their breaths mixed with the smoke.
Alex breathed in, glancing up only to realize Miles was looking at his lips with such longing in his eyes. Immediately, Alex knew.
He choked on the burning smog, coughing violently as they parted. Miles blinked innocently when he was the one reason that caused Alex to huff like an old man. "Easy there, Al." Miles patted him on the back. For the first time, Alex noticed how gentle those fingers tended to be when Miles touched him. It was painfully obvious and nearly unbearable.
He dropped his barely touched cigarette and heeled it out, shying away from Miles' touch as if he was to hurt him.
"You want another one?" Miles asked. He was suddenly stiff and nervous, eyeing Alex tentatively before looking down to take a drag. He knew Alex had known.Alex coughed a few more times. His throat felt burned and dry. "No, not now." Alex murmured, an answer to both the obvious question and the unspoken one.
Miles shrugged. He didn't lift his head back up to watch Alex when they went back into the bar.
+
Alex never really think about waking up every day right beside Miles, holding his hand on the street or whatever. It was not even that long after he broke up with Johanna. He had never even thought of having a taste of Miles' lips, although Alex would admit his friend can be very tempting at some moments. He loved Miles. It was just not like THAT.
They both pretended to be oblivious of what happened at that night. Miles wanted to kiss him sometimes, yet Alex preferred to just be his mate. It was no big deal.
But still, Alex wondered when Miles began to like him in a different way. The idea bothered him when they were just laughing and joking around. Miles could always find things that made Alex weirdly happy and Alex was aware that Miles was special. It scared him even more when the first wave of shock died away. Now, he couldn't help but observe his friend's every move. The way Miles played his guitar or the way his eyes sparkled when a new idea burst out. The way his nose crinkled when hearing something funny. The undisguised passion Miles had for things he loved: wrestling, fashion, music... and Alex.
