ex silentio | ivan goncharov x reader

ᴛᴡɪꜱᴛ

Twist

ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴀꜱɪᴄ ʟᴀᴡꜱ ᴏꜰ ᴘʜʏꜱɪᴄꜱ ᴄʟᴇᴀʀʟʏ ꜱᴛᴀᴛᴇ ꜱᴏ. ᴀʟʟ ᴏʙᴊᴇᴄᴛꜱ ᴀʀᴇ ᴅᴇꜰᴏʀᴍᴀʙʟᴇ.  ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɪꜱ, ɪᴛ ɪꜱ ᴘᴏꜱꜱɪʙʟᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱʜᴀᴘᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴀɴ ᴏʙᴊᴇᴄᴛ ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀᴘᴘʟɪᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏꜰ ꜰᴏʀᴄᴇ. ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇꜱ, ᴛʜᴇ ᴏʙᴊᴇᴄᴛ ᴄᴀɴ ʀᴇᴛᴜʀɴ ᴛᴏ ɪᴛꜱ ᴏʀɪɢɪɴᴀʟ ꜱᴛᴀᴛᴇ. ʙᴜᴛ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴅ, ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ᴏʙᴊᴇᴄᴛ ʜᴀꜱ ɪᴛꜱ ʟɪᴍɪᴛ, ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴏɪɴᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇ ꜰᴏʀᴄᴇ ɪꜱ ᴛᴏᴏ ꜱᴛʀᴏɴɢ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏʙᴊᴇᴄᴛ ʙʀᴇᴀᴋꜱ. ʜᴏᴡᴇᴠᴇʀ, ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴛʜᴏʀᴏᴜɢʜʟʏ - ᴄᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇꜱᴇ ʟᴀᴡꜱ ᴀᴘᴘʟʏ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴏᴜʟ ᴀꜱ ᴡᴇʟʟ? ʜᴏᴡ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴛᴡɪꜱᴛ ɪᴛ?

. . .

"Now I won't ever let you go, (Y/N), I promise," comforting words along with his warm breath reached your ear. It made your entirety tremble, your heartbeat quicken further. The proximity of his body was such that there were little to no gaps between you. He shifted his face, pressing a kiss on your forehead while his fingers dug into your hair, lulling you with a gentle hold on your nape. The affection his actions radiated with still didn't manage to calm you down completely. Disbelief filled you, and in such a state, you couldn't settle with the events that had happened. You simply couldn't. All of this seemed like a joke of sorts, or a dream - if you will. Which is why you found it hard to come to terms with the fact Ivan indeed loved you back. Currently, he was displaying that. And you just couldn't take it in.

"Is this reality?" you whispered. He placed his forehead against yours and smiled fondly. "Yes, it is, at last it is."

His answer didn't help you much so you didn't respond. You simply wrapped your arms around him, above his slender hips, rubbing his back. This wasn't the first time you hugged him, oh no. But it was so much different now. This time, your hands were... trembling. Your entire body was shaking, as if you couldn't handle the stress. You definitely felt anxious. Way too anxious.

And Ivan sensed this. Of course he would. He moved away a little, as if to give you some space, and looked at you, with worry bringing his eyelids almost shut. "Are you scared?" he asked and hit the bullseye so.

"Yes," there was no point in hiding it. You had never been in an actual relationship. To start out with something as severe as this, it was indeed overwhelming.

"That's completely okay. You know, I'm scared too," he said and chuckled to lighten up the atmosphere. "Breathe and think about it. And everything will get clear, and you'll find no reason to be scared."

"B-but you don't seem afraid," you had to point out.

"That's exactly why I was stuck in the bathroom for so long. After finding the letter which Nikolai wrote and left there, I had to calm myself down, evidently," he laughed once again and so did you.

"So... what now?" you asked, worsening the awkwardness you possessed. You had a terrible feeling this would end in a way you wouldn't like - be overthrown by affection or be stripped of it.

"Now? Well... we continue the everyday life just like before, just a tad bit better," he said and took a strand of (H/C) hair to play with it. Upon hearing his response, you felt your serene state come back to you, exposing itself as a smile on your face. What he said seemed so simple, yet so right - and you reminded yourself why you loved him.

You took his hand and kissed it, then proceeded to lean closer. He took it as a welcoming gesture to kiss you, and he wasn't wrong. Once your lips pressed again, you found yourself focusing much more on it compared to the first time, because indeed, you felt calmer now. And the kiss, well, it was intoxicating, and at the very moment you thought you had met bliss, the unexpected happened. You sensed his tongue move forwards, to your mouth, and you opened it, letting him come in. Ivan didn't bother to battle with your own muscle, as you gave in as soon as the kiss deepened. The mere feeling of this intimacy made your insides flare up - and combined with his tight embrace, you doubted you could feel any better.