Take a chance (S.M. soccer player AU)

04. His return

Leila chuckles to herself, throwing a magazine across the room in frustration. It was almost comical how right she was about Shawn.

Almost.

She would love to gloat to her former self, but she couldn't. It was far too late. Sometime, during all her defiance, Shawn fought his way into her heart and she didn't even notice. It was a silent victory on his behalf and she was not a wiling victim.

For the past month, she was forced to watch his face plastered all across magazines and social media and on his arm was a girl; a girl and it wasn't her.

He seemed happy in the photos, almost ecstatic. She would smile and her heart would flutter if it weren't for the fact that he was happy because he met someone new. It's as she feared. Shawn forgot about her and moved on. He found himself a new plaything and she became obsolete.

It was almost comical, but not at all. It was a tragedy that perfectly described just how messed up her judgement turned out to be. The very first photo came out a month after he left, during which they often conversed till dawn's light shone upon them. Who would have known that Shawn was pulling a sick joke on her heart?

She certainly didn't.

She gnawed on the inside of her cheek nervously as the time for the team to gather neared. It was a long time since she last saw him now. Five full months have come and gone, winter and spring just said their goodbyes and summer stepped in.

She clenches her fists tightly, until her nails dug into the palm of her hand, but she barely notices. The only thing she is really aware of is the sound of her heart throbbing against the cage of her chest. It's not until she looks into the mirror, that she's aware she's been biting her lip so badly it's bleeding. The blood is as red as her hair, reflecting her anger for him, not as blue as she feels inside.

Confident in the way she dressed, Leila walks away, deciding to not let Shawn and his stupid, handsome face affect her anymore. With her head held high, she made her way to the stadium, immediately finding something to busy herself with. She sorted whatever she had in her bag, making sure everything is in its rightful place.

„Hi." She flinches at the unexpected sound, turning in the direction where it came from. Her body tenses once her eyes find the source of the voice that destroyed her anxious pattern and instead of a smile, her mouth decides on a scowl. She refocuses on the sunflowers in his hands, narrowing her eyes at the now most hated flower and scoffs at the hopeful look in his eyes.

„Are you injured? Practice didn't even start." She speaks, but her voice is cold and professional, chilling him to the bone.

„I just wanted to see you." Shawn trails off, taking a few steps inside.

„You didn't answer any of my calls." He continues and she turns away, working on sorting her desk next.

„I changed my number." She responds, no trace of any emotions in her voice. Shawn wanted her to scream, to say anything that indicated she still cared, but there was nothing in her behaviour for him to cling to.

„Oh...that explains it." His voice reveals he's defeated and his shoulders sag to show he was feeling deflated.

„Why are you here, Mr. Mendes?" She asks and he releases a shaky breath, walking up to her table, standing right beside her.

„Ouch. Did we really revert back to last name bases?" Shawn questions, resting the bouquet on the corner of the immaculate desk.

„Mr. Mendes, unless you have something important to say...well, I'm rather busy to be wasting time at the moment." She replied.

There was no anger, no sadness, no joy or resentment. She seemed to be frozen in her emotions, no warmth in her voice.

Shawn nodded sadly, walking away quietly, hearing the flowers be tossed in the trash next to her desk. He didn't turn around, unsure of who it was that stood behind him. That girl barely reminded him of the girl he left behind and his heart struggled with the thought. He still spoke up before he left the room, refusing to let it go...to let her go.

„I missed you, Sunflower."

Shawn was not distracted during the practice at all, but his movements showed there was a lot on his mind. He allowed himself to look back at her a few times, but she never looked back at him.

Not once. At least not to his knowledge.

He was certain she found someone else to love, forgetting him in the process. It was a pain he never knew before. The past several months were torture to him. She stopped answering her phone and messages, her social media accounts vanished and there was no way for him to find her. Without a warning, Leila was gone from his life and there was a gaping hole in his chest where she rested before. To come so close to love and lose it so unexpectedly broke Shawn's heart and there was no one left to pick up the pieces.

Practice finished and he stumbled back to the locker room, sitting on the bench with his head in his hands a few minutes longer than needed. No one tried to mess with him, no teasing came from his teammates for once. Everyone felt something bad occurred in his heart and the way their favourite EMT stopped smiling was not a coincidence.

He had known that to love deeply meant to risk great pain, he had pursued superficial relationships and one night stands until he finally met her. And then he was lost. Lost in her constellations that made up her beautiful eyes. Lost in the smile that had healing properties, almost magical in the actual sense of the word. Shawn was no longer the master, he was a puppet. No more playing hard to get and dodging phone calls. He was hers and damn it, he couldn't just accept her sudden indifference to him. He stood up, stomping his way to her office without even showering first.

„Leila." He came in, but she wasn't there.

He walked in, looking around, seeing how clean the entire place was. A few steps closer to the desk and he saw the sunflowers he brought in the trash as he thought. Curious, he crouched down and searched for the yellow rose he had hidden inside. He took it out, examining it closely with a small smile once he realized the note he wrote was missing.

She still chose to take it. She still read it.

Meanwhile, Leila sat in her car, tapping her hands nervously on the steering wheel. She debated whether or not to open the note she had dug out of the bouquet Shawn had brought her earlier. It was a momentary lapse in judgement, a moment of weakness, but she could care less. Her curiosity had gotten better of her and there she was, opening the small paper with her fingers. Her eyes glided over the words he had handwritten, filling with tears and her chest shakes under the pressure of her heart beating.

„You've got a hold of me, don't even know your power. I stand a hundred feet, but I fall when I'm around you. Sunrise with you on my chest, no blinds in the place where I live. Daybreak open your eyes, so close with you on my lips. Touch noses, feeling your breath. Push your heart and pull away, yeah. Be mine, be my summer in a winter day love."