A Lesson Or A Blessing.

11

Previously on EILB.

   Muneenah yaseer sheikh is presently in the residence of Faruk muhammad ghazaali, and a wedding is to take place the next day. Now is it normal for a family to just accept a random girl without enquiries? And act all happy on seeing her?I dont think so...

Read on.

Solitude,

Oblivion,

Peace.

  
'ya Allah, I am by far the most indecisive human I know of in my life, ya Allah..I am so confused about alot of this and I do not know which way to go'
   'ya Allah, when it comes to deciding, perceiving... i am way too dumb and silly to not know what's right from wrong, I'm not sure if what I'm doing is haram, halal, makhruh, I do not know if I'm overthinking' 'ya Allah, I do not know what path I'm taking or if any of my deeds are being accepted, ya Allah..i'm not sure if this is what's best, if what I'm doing is what I should do'..
  'ya Allah, I'm not sure about alot of things in my life, but one thing I'm sure about 100% is your perfection and your mercy towards me, it's your perfection when it comes to making decisions and making plans, one thing i'm certainly sure about, is that..you will never go wrong'

     Muneenah slowly raised her palms to her face and subtly, moves it down to her cheek and chin,  afterwhich she places a soft kiss on both palms, the peck lasted for a while as she allowed her thoughts to trickle down the lanes of marvel....

     Sometimes, people just wish to descry the future, perhaps willing to revamp its nature, perhaps willing to preview what it entails.

   Sometimes, people wish for just a peep, perhaps not willing to weep. Wishing they could take a leap and just see a little of their destinies...

   Her eyes, deprived of a good night's sleep, her mind hunted from the numerous thoughts that crossed her mind rapidly, her organs, crashed, by the anxious and crunching feeling that gnawed at every bone and vein that lived inside of her, her entire being, that sat awoke, terrorized, by the whole idea of sleeping.. she was scared of the demons that hunted her, left her scarred, left her broken, left her sliced into pieces to quiver in her self defeat, she was scared of slipping into that world of oblivion..

  oh! It was no good at all!....

    Tossing and turning for hours un-ending, that little remaining flicker of a light inside of her raised her to perform salat:prayer, she wasn't sure if she deserved that light itself, with the amount of agnostic thoughts moving around inside of her, each time, like a dark wave crashing unto her and leaving her drenched in some darkness...there was still a glimpse of light, which she knew was out of the mercy of her lord..

  Most times, she tries to close her eyes into the seclusion of that darkness, hoping it was peaceful and steady, but each time she did, something...just something, plunges her out of that darkness and into this light.. Now, as she sat enveloped in the satisfaction of haven' to grasp illumination, she couldn't help but realize, that she was confused.

  Spiritually confused, morally confused, psychologically confused...she was uncertain about each step of hers, who could blame her? She took a single step once in her life, that landed her on an acrimonious surface, oh it teared her and cut her, it then let her bleed, each drip of that blood of hers, leaving a scar, uncleanable in the depth of her heart. No one could notice those were drips of blood that caged dreadful memories, as far as science was concerned, the heart was meant to pump blood anyways..not hers, it pumped heartache and melancholy.