nothing but a nightmare.

Dear Diary..

* chapter 1 *
* diary entry one *

3|22|12
6:34 pm

i was at the mall today to find my mom the perfect birthday gift, because her birthday is in a week. i've been saving my allowance for six months just to make her birthday special.. she does so much for me and my siblings, i just really feel like i need to pay her back. there's nothing in this world that amounts to what she's given me; she's given me life. she's given me opportunity. she's given me hope. with out her, i wouldn't even be here.

i'm only 16, but i have a lot of responsibility. my mom is a single mom of 3. i have a 7 year old brother, and a 2 year old sister. my mom works a full time job, plus a part time job so i spend a lot of time with my siblings. when my brother and i are at school, my moms friend from church watches our baby sister. sometimes, she watches all three of us, but i'm able to handle it so my mom usually leaves us three alone.

while i was at the mall, i found this beautiful ring.. i know she's going to love it, but i also found my future baby daddy.. * starts to drool. * no, i'm just kidding. but this guy gave me his number. after i left the jewelry store, i got myself some food. my mom was at home with the kids, and she let me have the day to myself.  so i was sitting down, eating, scrolling through instagram, just enjoying the little bit of time i have to myself.

i'm sitting there, eating, i got one headphone in, and this boy comes and sits down across from me.. i look up, and i realize it was the same guy i made eye contact with early. it was this tall, caramel, baby faced boy with a beard growing in. he was wearing grey joggers, a white t-shirt, and air force ones. i swear he looked soooo good. we both made eye contact, smiled, and kept walking. he was with a big group of guys, so i was afraid to say something to him. he came over here, and the first thing he said to me was

" hey beautiful, "

with a big smile on his face like he's known me for years.. he had so much confidence, and so much pride. my cheeks turned red, and i started smiling from ear to ear, barely able to speak i somehow spit out something,

" hu- ha- hi "

i know he could tell i was nervous, i was so embarrassed. it was like god sent this man to me personally.. he was almost glowing. he smiled at me real big, and my knees started shaking, he began to speak and even though i barely comprehended what he said, i managed to remember it all,

" i wondered away from the boys for a second just to give you my number, you wanna put it in your phone real quick? "

so, i pull out my phone,

" 528-128-3392, holla at me if you want shorty.. i gotta go, hope your day is as beautiful as you, "

and then he walks away. my heart was literally in my stomach i couldn't breathe. he didn't give me his name so i saved him under " caramel curls " because that's what he was. a tall caramel piece of heaven with curls on top his head. he looks delicious.

i didn't want to text him right away, and actually i still haven't. it was about 2:30 that he gave me his number, but i don't want to text him yet because i don't want to be thirsty. i left the mall at like 3:30, i bought myself a couple things then came home. i fell asleep, and i'm just now waking up. i feel like i might as well eat, shower, brush my teeth, and get comfortable before texting him. i mean, we've got all night to talk. i don't have to watch my siblings tomorrow, my moms off work.