beautiful

heartbreak hurts more than a knife

song - sorry: halsey

Cady's already awake when her alarm goes off. She didn't sleep an ounce the night before. She couldn't stop thinking about Janis. About what they did. Why she left. Why she wouldn't answer her calls. Why she left her all alone.

Her morning routine goes by in a blur. Before she knows it, she's standing in front of the mirror, dressed in a pink sweater, black skirt, and black vans. She takes a deep breath, staring at her small frame. Janis had seen her scars. She takes a shaky breath, slipping on Janis's jacket.

She grabs an apple as she leaves, closing the door behind her. A confused look flashes across her face as only Damian stands in front of her.

"Where's Janis?" Cady asks, taking a bite of her apple.

"I was just going to ask you the same question," Damian sighs. "I already tried knocking, but her mom said that she already left."

Cady and Damian make small talk about Heathers, Cady trying to distract herself from the thoughts running through her mind.

Janis doesn't want to see you. She regrets what she did last night. She's embarrassed by you.

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Cady and Damian walk into school, still talking about Heathers. And then she sees it. Janis making out with Kevin from her Calculus class. Cady's jaw drops, as does Damian's. Cady starts to shake, unsure of how to react.

Before Damian knows what to do, Cady lets out a loud sob. She's on the floor, starting to have a breakdown. He grabs her, pulling her into the bathroom. He sinks to the floor with her, holding her as she sobs.

"What...how...why..." Cady trails off.

"I know, Caddie. I know. She's told me she was gay since the end of eighth grade. I don't know," Damian says, brushing Cady's hair out of her face.

"Damian, I need to tell you something," Cady sobs.

"Caddie, you can tell me anything, And no, I won't tell Janis," he says.

"I...I think I'm in love with Janis," Cady whispers, attempting to wipe away her tears. "A-and she came over last night...and um...we kind of...had sex."

"You what? Oh, Caddie," he says, pulling Cady closer to him.

Cady soon calms down, some stray tears still streaming down her face. They leave the bathroom, walking towards Ms. Norbury's classroom.

Janis is standing there, alone. Rage fills Damian and Cady can't stop him from stomping up to her.

"What the fuck, Janis? After everything we have talked about, this is what you go and do?" he shouts.

"Damian, listen," Janis says.

"No. You don't get to do that. First, you get me to help you understand your fucking feelings for someone and then you go and make out with Kevin? That's the thanks I get? I've been your best friend since eighth grade, Janis. Eighth fucking grade. I stuck with you after Regina kicked you out of The Plastics. I've helped you through everything," Damian yells, tears building up in his eyes.

Janis is silent, not knowing what to say.

"Damian, I want to talk to her," Cady says.

He can only nod.

"Caddie," Janis starts.

"No. I gave you everything I had. I gave you me. And you don't even have the audacity to even say anything about leaving? I was alone Janis. I thought I could trust you. I thought you actually cared about me!" Cady yells, drawing the attention of other people around them.

"Caddie, it was a mistake. It was an impulsive decision," Janis says, looking down at the ground.

And before Cady can stop herself, she smacks Janis across the face. She shocks herself, but can't let Janis see that.

"Caddie," Janis says.

"No. Save it," she spits, throwing Janis's jacket on the ground.

Damian grabs Cady and they walk into homeroom, leaving Janis standing in the middle of the hall, trying to process what had just happened.

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Cady's day consists of Damian having to pull her out of class as she breaks down into tears, having to process what happened that morning. They spend lunch in the library, knowing that Cady can't even bare to spare a look at Janis without bursting into tears.

But all of that fades away when the last bell of the day rings. Damian meets her outside of her last class, walking to the auditorium.

Everyone opens their scripts and then the music to Beautiful starts to play.

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Janis sneaks into the auditorium as Cady's voice fills the entire room. Janis's eyes fills with tears as she realizes what she has done. She let go of her rock. The girl she's fallen for. She let go of her lifeline. Tears stream down her face as she watches Cady. She looks so happy there. Up on stage.

The image of Cady's scars fill her mid, only making the tears fall harder. How can such a girl who seems so perfect be so broken?