Collaborated Damage

Chapter Fifteen

"Oh won't you stay with me? 'Cause you're all that I'll ever need.." -Deceitful Time, San Francisco; "All I'll Ever Need" 

June offered me a stick of gum and a shook my head no. It's been a few weeks since the phone call and she's been treating me like glass every single fucking day, and it's been bugging the shit out of me. Donald has been just ignoring me, and I really don't blame him. I would too. 

So far every time I've picked up the guitar I couldn't play it. The shakes in my hands and arms would come back with sudden bursts. Instead of playing, I'd just lay down beside the beautiful instrument and dream of days that I could and would play. 

"Why are you even here if you're not gonna play?" Donald growled out, watching me as I laid on their living room floor.

I opened my eyes. "Because music is everything to me. Everything."

He shuddered as he gazed into my eyes. "What did that girl take from you?"

June sat down Indian style beside my head, occasionally running her fingers through my messy hair. She used to do it every night before our shows to make me appear the sex crazed rock star that all of our fans thought I was. It felt good, her rough fingers were familiar and played with my hair like a guitar.

 "Sometimes I think that she's not really gone, but she decided to take a long break." I whispered.

June let out a choked sob and some of her tears fell onto my face. Donald turned his head away from me and I closed my eyes again. My fingers itched to create music again but the reality of that happening again was zero to none. Something was gone from inside of me, like a missing lung or a missing toe. 

 Donald laid down by my other side, his head resting on my shoulder. At that moment I had been forgiven for leaving him and June and our wonderful world of music we created, and now I knew that it was okay to cry. June laid down beside me crying herself. 

I kind of knew this was the end, I mean the tough as hell June was crying.