Damaged

State of My Head

"We've been shot up, beat up by the fallin' of the arrows

Yeah, I'm full of deep cuts right down to the marrow

But there's no doubt we'll get out from the bottom of the barrel

That's the state of my, state of my, state of my head" - Shinedown

Fitz paced in front of Eli's closed office door. He knew he had to talk to Eli, but he was at a loss about how to approach the topic. Olivia's bombshell at dinner last week had left him with a sour taste in his mouth. How could she be contemplating visiting Edison in prison? After all he had to done to her, to them, Fitz had figured that she would want to avoid the man at all costs. Taking a deep breath, he finally turned to the door and rapped his knuckles against the wood.

"Come in." Closing his eyes for a moment, Fitz worked up his courage before placing his hand on the doorknob and twisting. Stepping inside the warm office, he closed the door behind him and took the few steps that brought him before Eli's desk. Eli lifted his head from the stack of papers on his desk, his smile upon seeing his daughter's boyfriend quickly fading as he took in Fitz's agitated look.

"What's wrong? Where's Olivia?" Eli's eyes flickered toward the door as if he expected his daughter to come waltzing through the door. Fitz tried not to smile at the worry in Eli's voice – she would always be her dad's baby.

"She's with Abby. They're shopping." Eli nodded, the worry melting from his face. He turned his attention back to the papers before him, moving a red pen across the top one.

"What's going on?" Fitz scratched the back of his head as he tried to decide on the best way to broach the topic with Eli. If he knew Olivia's father, he wouldn't be happy about Olivia's decision to visit Edison, either. Finally, Fitz decided that the best way to tell Eli was to just get on with it and say the words.

"Olivia's decided she wants to visit Edison." The angry silence in the room was almost palpable. Eli's dark, hardened gaze was quick to find Fitz's.

"Why would she want to do that?" The soft tone of Eli's voice spoke volumes of his anger. Fitz knew that Eli typically was not a shouter. He could be remarkably calm with anger bubbling just below the surface.

"She heard that he was moved here and decided that she needs to speak to him to forgive him. Some therapy exercise."

"Damn that woman," Eli cursed, dropping his pen onto the pile of papers and leaning back in his chair. "I hired her to help Olivia. Not talk her into forgiving the person who caused these issues in the first place."

"I've tried talking her out of it."

"Thanks for telling me, Fitz. I'll try to think of some way to get her to see this is nonsense."

"There's more, sir." Fitz nervously crammed his hands into his pant pockets, feeling as if he were back in elementary and standing before his principal, about to be accused of some devious crime.

"Fitz, I've told you before that you don't have to call me 'sir'." Eli tilted his head, eyeing the younger man before him and the anxiousness that surrounded him.

"Sorry," Fitz half-smiled before allowing the words to tumble from his mouth, "Edison was transferred to Cumberland because of me."

"I don't understand."

"When I heard that one of my best friends was going to be the warden at Cumberland, I asked him to pull a few strings. He got Edison transferred."

"Why would he do that?" Eli's slightly patronizing tone was better than Fitz had hoped for. At the least, he thought Eli would have thrown him out by now. He never expected him to listen.