We Remain

Chapter 4

*Katniss POV*

Peeta knows I don't want children, and that I never will. I trust him, but not anything else. Why would he ask me that? He has episodes still. What would we tell them when they got older? What would they do if they walked in on Peeta calling me a mutt and choking me? I don't want kids. Peeta will never convince me to. I love him, but ever since on the hill with Gale, telling him in never going to have kids, I meant it. After Prim, after everyone I've lost, I can't trust that it will be okay again.

I stare at myself in the bathroom mirror. By wavy chocolate hair falls over my scarred face. I'm the reason Peeta was hijacked. If only I died in the games. Peeta would be just fine. There would be no War. But the Games would still be going on. Peeta the mentor. I couldn't do that to him. Leave him alone. I can't do that to him. But no children. Not now.

I walk down the stairs. The house is quiet. I hate it being this quiet. I walk into the kitchen prop myself into the counter and eat a biscuit out of a basket. I can't help but eat all of them. I feel so bad. But having children is both the people's decision. Not just one. Unless it's an accident.

I hear the door open and close. Peeta's back. I hop down and go to the living room. Haymitch. What's he doing here.

"What are you doing here, Haymitch?" I ask.

"I saw Peeta walk out the house ten minutes ago. Did you two have a fight?" He asks.

"I wouldn't call it a fight, more like a disagreement," I mumble. He gestures for me to sit in a chair. I nod and sit down. Haymitch sits down next to me.

"Peeta wants children. I don't." I tell him.

"I know it's hard, sweetheart, but do you love Peeta?"

I nod. "More than anything."

"Then show him how much you love him by carrying his child."