We Remain

Chapter 11

Katniss POV*

~6 months later~

I hold Peeta's hand tightly as we walk out of our house. It's getting more and hard for me to hide my stomach. Or even comprehend what's going on inside there. A little human, living in my womb, waiting to be born. Born into this world that I wish I could get out of.
For the past few months, Peeta Suggested that we go to the meadow once a week. 'To calm me' in his words. I get what he is doing, and he is right. It does calm me a little, but when I feel it stir inside me, I only panic.
"Katniss?"
His voice brings me out of my thoughts. I look up from my swollen belly and see we are close to the fence. I look over at him. Peeta hasn't had a flashback in around four months. I think him thinking about the baby fights the venom off. I don't know.
Peeta carries nothing but a blanket and a basket of bread. He's dressed in some nice summer clothes with is just a white shirt and dark brown slacks. I wear a white dress that fits me well. It accesses my curves and my belly, and is flowing above my ankles. My hair is down today, since Peeta said earlier that I glow with it down. He tried painting me before we left, but I simply kept moving.
"I know, pregnancy head," he sighs.
"What?" I ask. He must've been talking.
"You're just zoning off, like you're somewhere else," says Peeta as he looks at me.
"I'm sorry, I just have a lot on my mind," I say. It's true. I just can't focus on one thought.
"I know, it's okay," he says, kissing my head and helping my under. I remember when I didn't need help getting in and out of places. The bath, the fence, the bed, the couch. All simple tasks. Even going to the bathroom. And all because my stomach is in the way. I never thought it would get this big.

Once we both get under, we grasp our hands and start walking to the meadow. Green trees and brown trunks pass us as we walk. I feel the sudden urge to search one of them to find my bow. But Peeta says not over exert myself. Especially when it's three months till the big day.
We reach the meadow. A field with soft delicate grass filled with all different colored flowers, like a beautiful painting that Peeta could easily do. He lays the blanket on the grass and helps me sit down on it. He sits beside me and takes out a couple cheese buns. I sit back a little and rest my hand on my stomach and look down at it. How's it possible? I think. How can I support life inside me? How is it even breathing? There is no oxygen in the womb. How is it possible for me to be carrying a small human in me?
"Peeta," I chase out, snapping out of my thoughts. "What gender do you want it to be?"
He looks over at me. "Well, I guess I would want a girl. But if it's healthy, I'm fine with-"
"Peeta!" I snap. "Don't give that bullshit, please. Just simple. Boy or girl."
"Okay, girl," he answers. Thank you.
"Why?" I ask, calmer this time.

Peeta hands me a cheese bun and rests his hand on my belly where my hand is. "Because I want to have a little girl, that has chocolate seas and grey cloud eyes. A little Katniss, that I can love from first sight, like I did the first time."
I start to cry, my hormones are wack, but I am crying at what he said. You can live a thousand lifetimes, and never deserve that boy. Haymitch's voice says in my head. He's right. I don't deserve Peeta, I don't deserve to carry his love inside me. His baby. But I do love him. Snd I will do this for him.
We sit in silence till a bird, a Mockingjay, comes and lands right on my belly. I stair down at it and slightly smile. Peeta looks over at me and the bird and smiles
"Sing," he whispers.
I think about this for a second. And then I realize that the baby hasn't heard me sing, so now I do.

"Deep in the Meadow, under the Willow. A bed of grass. A soft green pillow. Lay down your head, and close your sleepy eyes. and when again they open, the sun will rise. Here it's safe, and here it's warm. Here the causes guard you from, every harm. Here your dreams are sweet, and tomorrow brings them true. And here is the place, where I love you."

The Mockingjay repeats the tune back to me. And then it's starts to echo to others and soon, the whole forest is alive with the tune. I see Peeta smile. The bird flies off, still singing the tune.
I rest my head on Peeta's shoulder and close my eyes, letting the birds sing me to sleep.