#DepressionBuddies | Yoonmin

_10

I stood at the side of the bridge, watching the icy water run below me. The thought of ending it all now ran through my head as a plausible action but, something stopped me from doing it just yet.

The slow river was almost mesmerising. I knew my body would freeze quickly. I never liked the cold.

I knew what would happen. I'd jump, hit the water, and not try to come back up. I'd expell all the air from my lungs slowly as I watched myself fall deeper and deeper. I'd breathe in; my lungs would fill with water. I'd choke for a moment and then it'd be over. So simple, so easy.

I was torn away from my thoughts when I heard a sudden, small gasp. I looked over to see another teenage boy standing at the edge.

"Sorry if I startled you, I didn't see you there." He said, voice wavering with obvious distress and cold.

"It's alright." He laughed nervously. The night fell silent again, almost awkward as we both thought of something to do or say.

"So, uh, you gonna jump too?" He chuckled again, still very nervous sounding.

I hummed, "Presumably so. You?"

"Yeah. My fucking cat died so I figured now was a good time to go- nobody else out there to miss me."

"Damn, relatable. But, I'm an orphan. I've never even seen a cat in person." I said and stepped down from the bars. I sat on the concrete curb and rubbed my hands together. He, too, backed away from the edge and sat down. I found it a little amusing how he and I both came her to end our lives but are making such casual small talk, now.

"An orphan? I'm sorry to hear that." He said, sounding almost genuinely sorry.

"Eh, these years have sucked but I got over it. Doesn't mean anything to me, anyways. I've got nowhere to go but hell." I muttered the last sentence, remembering how Miriam used to tell me I was going to hell for being gay.

"Yeah, me too. But, I'm gay so it's almost expected of people to tell me that." The but sighed, shivering from the weather, "How about you? Why're you going there?" A small chuckle passed his lips.

"Same reason as you."

"Really!?" He perked up.

"Yea,"

"I've never met another gay before," he laughed.

"Neither have I," a tiny smile grew on my lips. His laugh was almost an intoxicating sound, "What's your name?"

"It's not important, what's yours?"

"Yoongi."

"I was expecting some snarky comment in return, like, 'hi, 'it's not important' I'm so-and-so.' My name's actually Jimin."

After a few moments of silence, I spoke up and said, "Weird question, but, do you wanna, maybe, jump together? I feel like it'd be more fun."

"As great as that offer sounds, I kind of like you now. Let's grab smoothies first. And, maybe some real food for you. Gosh, you look like you haven't eaten in years."

"That's partially correct. But, I wouldn't mind. I mean, if it's not a burden to you." I said, becoming a little shy.

"It's not at all. I know a small diner down the road that's always warm and they have the best hot chocolate this time of year." He smiled and stood up, reaching out for my hand to help me up, "You're freezing!"

"Yeah, I know. I was kicked out of the orphanage earlier this morning before I could ever grab my jacket." I felt myself frown when he let go of my hand. The warmth was inviting and man did I need it.

He noticed this, I think, and took my hands back in his as we walked, "I hope you don't mind. You're just so cold." He rubbed my hands between his.

His eyes met mine and at that very moment, something inside me clicked. I knew his face from description. Could it be him? Could it really?

"Do you... Maybe... Have a sister named Minjee?" I asked. He stopped walking.

"Yeah, I do."

Chills ran through my body, "Oh my God, it's really you. Y-Your sister and I were in the same orphanage."

"Why was she there?" His breathing changed and his grip on my hands tightened.

"Your mom, I guess, put her in there about a year ago. She used to tell me about you all the time and how she thinks I'd love you and how she misses you."

Tears welled up in his eyes.

"I haven't talked to or seen her in over two years. How is she? Is she healthy? I have to go get her- I-" the tears began to cascade down his cheeks. He was slightly shorter than me so it was easy to comfort him. Though, I only know how to comfort small children. Maybe it works on teenagers, too.

I took him into a tight hug, my body shivering from the contact of his warm body on my cold one, "She's okay, don't worry. Very smart for her age."

He pulled away from me a few moments later, "I'm sorry," he sniffled, "here, let's uh, keep going." He took my hands back in his and we continued walking down the dimly lit park pathway.