Hey hey hey. I haven't written in a while. Its currently 1:08 a.m. on a school night. I'm listening to requiem from dear evan hansen. Anyways, From the time of my last entry quite a few things have happened. I found someone that makes me happy. Like I'm not saying that I am only happy when with them. But like when I think of them I can't help but get a cheek smile on my face. Its good.
I haven't felt this way since late 2017 until January of 2018 so its been a solid year. Only this time, the person like is in the same state I am. Like WOAH. Wack. Absolutely mad. Anyways, I don't know exactly how I got to meet her it just kinda happened. I hope she likes me, or imma be in an awkward place. The thing is, she's very tough. But I got to see a soft side of her, and its captivating!! I don't want to sound cheesy but hearing her open up, and get more comfortable talking to me was the greatest feeling in the world. I shared some of my childhood along with her, and we talked about our dreams and aspirations. What we think of kids, and I've never bonded with anyone in such a way. It feels like something straight out of a movie. And I don't want to lose her.
The funniest part is that I tried to hint at the idea of getting together, back when we didn't know much about each other. (Because like an idiot. I went solely off of looks) and now I'm beginning to understand that I like her for the way she is. She's so confident in herself, so independent, and carries herself like royalty. I want to give her the world! She makes my inner prince come out. And AGONY. I don't know what to do. I don't know if I should go for it. we have a date tomorrow, and I'm hoping I can manage to get an arm around her. Possibly. She likes to take things slow, and is reserved. I find that she also talks to me, unlike my last relationship. I wrote a heartfelt note to her for valentines day which coincidentally I'm giving to her in roughly 10 hours. And in 21 hours we'll be watching a movie. I'm hoping to not fuck this up. I really like her. more than the girls around here. and certainly on part with how I felt a year ago. Probably more so. I'm happy, and my heart feels like that one part of "Into the Woods" where the characters sing "I never thought id love my life, I would've settled for another, I never thought I would be so happy." Because its beating, and once again I'm the prince in agony because shes just out of reach.
