Thoughts of an Awkward Teenage Girl

I Can't Think of a Title... Help

23 February - 12:48am

So I feel like no one's reading these which is actually great because I can STEP UP MY RANTING WOOO.

So I kind of met a new guy, and he's so cute and tall and he has these pretty blue eyes and I haven't talked to him in 6 years (yes 6!!!) but we started talking so comfortably that it feels like we've been in contact the entire time. We met again when I was playing basketball with him at a school camp, and we were immediately like flirty and teasing which was SUPER CUTE.
We text a lot about random shit like how much I hate peas and bananas, to his weird obsession with Selena Gomez.
But I'm kind of worried that I'm pretending everything is better than it is...
It's kind of hard to be serious with him sometimes.. We've had deep conversations but like I'm VERY ANXIOUS and he's not exactly the most empathetic person.
Like he 'doesn't see the point in support because it doesn't change the outcome' kind of thing.
Yeah...
I mean, I'm gonna give it a crack.
If it develops into something, it develops into something. If it doesn't, it was never meant to be.

But damn he's so attractive (heart eyes x100). And I'm like, definitely not.

FUCK SAKE I NEED TO GET A GRIP AND STOP COMPARING HIM TO OTHER RELATIONSHIPS.

Also ADVICE TIME X2:
1) Something I've discovered works extremely well for me is making my bed in the morning, even when I don't have time to. It calms and organises my mind, setting me up for the day ahead, and when I inevitably come home at the end of the day sad as fuck, I have a nicely made bed to get into and sob.
So make your bed every morning! It's not that hard!!

2) If you are a chronic overthinker like me, where one negative can spoil a whole day, I suggest writing down in a small notebook one thing each day that you enjoyed/that made you happy. I keep this notebook and a pen next to my bed so every night I write another thing down.
From little things like 'a nice sandwich's to things like 'doing well on my exam's, I have been completing this book for 3 years now and have found these entries to be really beneficial. It just makes each day so much more bearable, plus it's really cool/sad/fun to read through how and again.
TRY IT!!

Anyway, stressed rant over.