sunflower [ poetry/ proses/ quotes]

➸ catastrophic effect

Slowly it entered the pore of my skin

A sudden urge to fix everything, but not knowing where to start. A feeling of having to do so much, that a lifetime is too short and instead of doing it staring blankly at the floor in front of me. My legs forgot how to walk. My existence dissolved like water spilled on ink. I'm trembling, shaking, trying to get rid of this feeling, knowing too well that it will come back. The chaos always comes back. It's a blur in my head. Blindfolded in a dark room. And I don't know what to do. I try and try and keep trying but for me it's never enough. Me, myself, isn't enough. Each minute of my day has to be planned. Being bored feels like a waste. They're screaming in my head and I don't know where all the voices are coming from. Past, present, future, it's all mixed up. I beg it every time to stop. To make it quiet and sometimes they listen. But once in while I wonder how it felt to be overwhelmed by life and then it all starts over again.