I realized something scary recently
I don't think I'm actually over you
I think I've just been repressing it
Repressing it to the point is hurts me when you genuinely smile at me
When you try to help me
It makes me angry that I can't get these feelings out
I can get them out without hurting/confusing you and everyone around us
I want to be over you
Because I don't want to hurt you anymore
I don't want to hurt anyone
I don't want our relationship to change
I want to be friends
You could easily be leaving next year
So I have to repress these feelings so I don't hurt our friendship
Because if you do leave us
I don't want you to think back and
Only have bad memories of us
So I'll keep hurting to avoid hurting you
I'll be okay
I just want you to be happy
I will be as open as I possibly can
And I will make sure that I give you good memories
