Anything For You

Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Dirk nodded, and walked right beside him, shivering slightly once outside.

Jake felt Dirk shiver and looked at him. "Are you cold? I told you to bring a jacket! Do you want mine?"

He looked back at Jake and shook his head "No, no. I’m fine. Jackets are far too overrated." He chuckled slightly.

Jake shook his head, chuckling. "You're very silly, you know Strider?" He squeezed his hand lightly.

Dirk squeezed his hand in return, giving him a slight smile, "Yeah I know. You're silly too if you're my boyfriend."

"Tell me about it! I don't think anyone would willingly start a relationship if they knew it would be this messy." Jake looked away and blushed just slightly. "Too bad I had to go and fall in love with a dickprince like you!"

"Pfft." He nudged him lightly, "you're acting as if that's a bad thing!"

"It's very tiring sometimes." Jake nudged him back. "You're a very high-maintenance boyfriend! You get into fights, you forget to go to sleep, you forget to stop working and rest..." He smiled softly again. "But I don't regret falling in love with you and I wouldn't have it any other way."

Dirk sighed at first, his eyes moving downward. But he looked up and smiled when Jake said he didn't regret it. "I don't know what the hell I would do without you, Jake."

“Maybe you wouldn't get into so many fights." He looked at Dirk and shrugged sheepishly.

"Don't say that. You know I had a problem. Without you I would probably be in a fight right now." He took his hand from Jake's and put around Jake's shoulders.

Jake leaned into Dirk's touch and sighed. "I'm glad I could help, even if just a bit."

"You helped a lot more then you think," Dirk kissed his temple.

"I feel like it's still not enough. You still look so unhappy sometimes..." Jake looked away sadly.

Dirk sighed, "I'm just having lots of things going through my head. Don't worry. You help a lot. But," he took a deep breath, "There's just things that can't really be helped with.”

"I do wish you'd talk to me about those things..." He gulped. "Sometimes... I feel like you're still afraid of opening yourself to me. Of showing yourself."

"I- those things... How do I say this. I'm… trying to hide from them." He looked down, "Do you want the truth? Yes, I am still afraid to show myself. And to tell you what's wrong. I'm scared of what you'll think of me after I tell you." He looked away, "I'm opening myself up right now, huh?"

Jake lay his head on Dirk's shoulder while they walked and hummed quietly. "You're doing great. You should do this more often." He turned his head towards Dirk's. "But I want to know all the truth... I want you to show yourself and I want to know what's wrong so I can try to help you in any way I can. You don't have to be afraid. I love you and nothing can change that. Nothing that has happened in the past and nothing that still happens now." He smiled sadly. "I know that no matter what, you're a good person."

“You wouldn't like the truth. All those days I went out walking... I'm always getting things off my mind. I always try to tell you, but no words come out, and it makes it even harder. Fighting was just... My gateway out, I guess?? I don't know how to explain it..."

"I don't care if I like it or not, I want to know the truth. I don't mind you going out on those walks, everybody needs some alone time. But Dirk... Please. I could be your gateway if you told me?..." Jake sighed. "You can trust me."