At His Feet

Ponders about friendship ties

(A/N: Hello everyone! Just wanted to say thank you all for your support and the time you take to read this. It means very much to me and sorry for not being consistent with the stuff. I just wanted to show my appreciation towards you guys and I hope you guys are blessed and learning something new with this. God bless you all.)

1 Samuel 18:1

After David had finished talking with Saul, he met Jonathan, the king's son. There was an immediate bond between them, for Jonathan loved David.

This week I guess I'm going to be learning about friendship. I was learning last week about soul ties (I think that is what they call it) and how certain ties with those around us can shape us as well as influence us in a good or bad way. It makes sense because we're influenced by people in our circle.

As TD Jakes once said is that who we allow in our circle, they become mirrors so we better be careful because if someone close to us has a secret agenda - they'll distort our reflection.

Jonathan and David's friendship are goals to be honest, because it was pure and intimate - genuine. Usually, when we hear the word 'intimate', people (maybe its just me) just think of it as a romantic or sexual sort of thing but it's not! Intimate basically means close and private - that you allow someone to get to a chamber of your heart that you wouldn't let the majority in.

It's based on trust and is so beautiful to see. Growing up, I didn't feel like I had that and when I did allow myself to be seen - it blew up painfully. I longed for a friendship like the one David and Jonathan had with one another. Looking back, I had wanted that for a long time.

Every anime I watched or movie I drifted towards or book - they all had breathtaking, beautiful, heart wrenching friendships. I was never into romantic movies but friendship ones as well as family movies that deals with broken ties and learning to trust and grow again.

The thing I love about open relationship is that there's this unbounded trust - a radical honesty. That's the way relationships are supposed to be. In the beginning, God walked with Adam and Eve. They were open physically, spiritually, and emotionally. They received love and returned it but then the fall came...and the world forgot how to love.

Lately I've been pondering on that.

I'm meant to love. God made me to receive love and then pass it on but, looking at my life, the world taught me the opposite.

I was taught to harden up and hide because the world is tough. I was taught to not let people close because everyone has an agenda - they all will conspire against me one day. I was taught to build walls around my heart that kept the good things out but yet allow the bad things in.

Yet God teaches me something else: Those walls must be broken - they are defective and instead of protecting me, those walls cages me in and harms me.

New walls need to be built. Walls of love that will allow the good things in, at the same time, keep the bad things out.

I have friends now - friends that God blessed me with - but I need to allow myself to be intimate with them. God's my best friend - I talk to him more than my own family but He's been telling me for a while now to open up - allow my friends in the chamber. The ones I know will be true.

Allow myself to be knitted to others in God because I'm a relational being. I'm a person with painful ties that must be replaced with good ties.

In other words; I need to let go of my past experiences with ties and grab the new ties. Let go of the past and press forward to the future by being present in the present.