Kaira OS

Falling back

I'll live my life in remembrance,
Your promise I won't forget!

He had almost accepted the fact that it was done, that his Naira was never to be found! In the dark times, he promised to never forget her, but who was he kidding, He loved his carefree Naira just as much. Inspite of lot he fell for her, sometimes known, sometimes unknown, a few times she touched the shreds of his Sherni, and at times, he would just love this carefree bunch of joviality, Naira was now.

In that form and this, He loved her, loving her was the only thing that was natural to him, He didn't know how not to love her, and trust me when I say, He had tried, He had tried to keep away, He had tried to not string the cords that brought her to him, because they also brought her to pain.

He had tried to keep himself away from her, but He failed, He failed the very next second He said He would try. He couldn't help himself but make sure she is okay, at all times, He didn't want to invade her space, just make sure no one breached hers, and if possible carve a niche in hers.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She asked when she figured He wasn't who he said he was, he was Kartik, and not Siddharth. That he wasn't a nobody, but her husband. She figured there was something her family was hiding, and launched a search! It wasn't that difficult when she knew to look.

"I was afraid, that you would hate me, more than that, I was afraid you would be hurt, after knowing what had happened, I don't want you to be unhappy, ever"

"What happened?" She asked. And he knew, he had to, he couldn't lie to her, not for something like this, not when she was asking, he couldn't deny her that right.

He recited that night to her, holding her hands, deriving strength from her, he confessed his crimes, his reasons for such a blasphemy.

Tears were rolling down her eyes, she didn't really know all this, she couldn't recall, but she could hear the truth in his voice, she could almost feel the loss, almost, her hand slid down to her abdomen, trying to feel something which she couldn't.

"The shock was going to be a danger for you, the baby was alone needed a mother, and Keerti was sleeping, no one knew when she would wake up, I thought it was all a sign, I messed it up, but I sure didn't want to keep the baby away from Keerti, nor did I want to lie, but one thing lead to another, I made the mistake, while thinking I was doing the right thing." He confessed, it didn't take a lot out of him to do so either, he knew he had screwed up, but he was more upset of what it lead to than the deed itself, he in his mind was helping Naira, and if time comes to screw up again, he might do it all over again, only for her.

Even she knew, that his love for her went beyond the borders of rights and wrongs, that her love, was his madness, his strength and his weakness! She didn't know him, not from before, but even one look at this guy now, would tell her that he would move mountains for her, even if he knew, that beyond those mountains, she wouldn't be with him, he would, if she wanted.

She needed time to process everything, it was too much, she told him so, she didn't want to leave him like that, but she didn't know what was more, his love which overwhelmed her, or the hurt and pain of loosing a baby, husband, and family.

It was his love again, which let her go, as he had once voiced it himself, "My love for you doesn't depend on whether or not you return it" and Kartik Goenka was many things, but a liar, he was not.

Naira went back to her house, distraught and disconnected, unsure of what was happening, Who was she to really trust, the man who was her husband apparently, had hidden facts from her, the man who claimed to be her brother had hidden facts from her, the family that claimed to love her, didn't tell her anything about anything. Who was she to trust?

Not finding answers, her hand slipped down to her abdomen again, and she tried to find the part of her which was missing. She had a baby, her own little baby girl, unknown to herself, she broke down by the foot end of her bed. Sobbing for the lost child, for the lost love, for the lost life.

Unknown to her, a pair of eyes watered, wanting to be sure she was safe and sound, they always followed her. But he couldn't be away, not anymore, not when she was so broken, he couldn't will himself to stay away.

He climbed the window, went to sit beside her, he didn't touch her, he didn't know if he was allowed to do that, but he wanted to assure her, that he would be there, whatever were the case, however was the life.

She had noticed his presence, she felt him sit beside her, she tried to get her breath under control, she didn't want to appear this weak in front of an almost stranger. But as soon as she attempted to do that, another sob threatened to break out, when she sneaked her arms around him. She didn't know why she did it, was it a reflex, but she knew in those arms, she could unabashedly loose it, and won't be judged.

He whispered a few nothings into her ear, but even he didn't know what would make it all better, he didn't know how he would fill that gap, he didn't know how they would be okay, or will they even be?

When she calmed down a little, he started whispering, "She was so tiny, a small button nose, warm black eyes, small hands, feet, she was perfect! Smaller than my hands, when she held my finger, I knew I was gone."

He reminisced about her, first time so freely, no one ever asked him, about her, she was like his secret, he didn't want to share that with anyone either, he didn't want to tell about the other princess who had taken her heart away, he didn't want to tell how perfect she was, how he loved her, how he wanted to bring the world at her feet. Only his queen, deserved to know about his princess.

She had calmed down a little, eager to know about her, "She was prettier than you!" He chuckled a little, "She would have become our sherni, our little sherni, our cub, she had fought a battle for life, but Krishnaji didn't want this little perfection for us, he called back" his voice was breaking a little.

After that one day, even he hadn't mourned for his daughter again, he didn't deem himself worthy, not when she didn't know about it, he wanted to share but the time was never right, but he didn't realise, it never would be. There was nothing which would make the pain for this easier.

Finding some peace, and some love in each other's arms, they had passed away to another world, crying and consoling, somewhere in between.

The morning found them, she was sleeping peacefully on his shoulder, while he admired the love of his life peacefully after a long time. She wasn't his yet, he didn't know what was on her mind either, but he felt much better, like some weight had lifted from his chest, like he could breathe better again. He just caressed her hair, and admired the bundle of love he held.

"Kartik" she said, and it sounded like music to him, she hadn't called him that in quite some time. He didn't respond, he was overjoyed hearing it from her, "Kartik" she probed again.

"Say that again" he asked

"Kartik?" She asked

"Yes, Kartik. That's my name, your Kartik, your mendak, only yours. Now and forever."

She wondered at him, she didn't know what to say, she didn't know what was the right answer to these words, it wasn't that she didn't want to answer, she just didn't know.

Seeing the frown on her forehead, he smoothed the lines and said, "Shhh, There is no hurry, I'm right here, you can answer whenever, and there is no right or wrong answer to this, it's only what you feel like Jaan" he gave her one warm and his smiles, and she didn't know her heart could melt more than the mess it had already made.

She wanted to say something nice to him, may be a thank you, for helping her last night, but before she could, the door knocked, and he began to hurry, towards the window, when she knew what she wanted to do.

Authors notes -

This is a birthday gift story, for someone very special, sammy_kaira and next part is there ofcourse😝
Enjoy!