This can't be happening

Ch. 19

Back at the compound I didn't say anything to Landon and I laughed at myself for my predictability. I always had mood swings; emotion ran my life because I always let it get the best of me. This is why I don't get personal with people, then they see my faults. I stay at safe distance when I act and I like it that way.

I work quietly and efficiently just like I do when I'm on a mission. But this mission isn't from Cornwall or Phoenix. It's from me. I need to figure out what I believe and make sure that it coincides with the truth. After I finish inputting data from one of the files I get up. "Bathroom break." I say before Landon can ask what I'm doing, I'd rather not hear his voice.

As I'm sneaking away from the boys I realize that this is what they would consider losing control. They want me to get better and follow rules but I can't do that anymore. Not when I don't know if I believe in the person giving them to me. It strikes me as odd that I never broke into Cornwall's office before. I didn't need to when I broke the rules the first time, or even when I completely disobeyed orders to save my sister. I don't need a plan, I know every detail about Cornwall's office, and at four in the afternoon it is at its most vulnerable.

"Hey Timmy." One of the world's dumbest security guards, but of course I'm a little angry and dramatic right now. I forget if he is the one that I intimidate or hit on; it's not an essential thing to remember because they always tell me themselves. Terrible actors, they don't know that you also have to lie with your body language.

"Alice!" He says and stands on one leg, it shortens him. He also smiles uneasily hoping that I'm not in a bad mood, which I am. Intimidate.

"Let me in this office." I say with all the anger I'm feeling.

"Oh- Okay. Um. But Cornwall..."

I just give him a look and then walk in when Tim steps aside. His office is always warm and homey to me, even now when I feel like I don't belong. I'm not sure where to look to find proof but I start with the computer and then remember something. Phoenix had the team write everything down because he didn't trust the computer. I checked for anything about Phoenix on his computer. There were notes from board meetings but nothing else.

It seemed too clean for someone who hates his partner, but maybe Cornwall was equally distrustful of the computer system. Phoenix could always hack Cornwall too. I might be going about this the wrong way.

I cringe as I look for the most recent mission that Cornwall gave out. It is an assassination. I have a name and a face, but no more time to stay in this office. Before I go I stick a bug behind one of the pictures on the wall. I took it from Landon's desk, he'll never notice it's gone.

"Let Cornwall know that I want to see him." I tell Tim when I leave.

"Long bathroom break. I see you went to the other side of the building, the side you are banned from until you finish inputting files." Alex says the second I walk back into their office. I automatically look at Landon. I don't even need a cover story, they'll be happy that I'm questioning Cornwall. Alex asks to talk to me in his office and he shuts the door. The other boys lean in their chairs to see through the windows what will happen. "Explain."

"Landon asked me if I ever question Cornwall's orders. I never have and it made me wonder if Cornwall is..." I couldn't even say the words out loud. "I had to talk to him, he's my mentor." I lie on instinct.

Alex nods and crosses his arms tightly. "One more day of work here, then you're done. I don't care if the work isn't finished, Landon can take care of it." He is hostile and it sounds like it's a punishment, which makes me terrified. I guess my instinct gets me into trouble, I should've remembered that.