Reverend Green's Bible Of Misanthropy

My strangest encounter as a Reverend?

28/02/19

5:23pm

My strangest encounter as a Reverend?

4revgreen: I had a personal message from "AristotleH" asking me about my weirdest encounter as a Reverend. (Thank you, I had a great chat)  I thought it'd be interesting to share the story. It's not 100% weird or anything. But nothing weird ever really happens in this village.

It was last year,and it was during Sunday service. Every Sunday I'll read a story from the bible to the villagers who turn up, and then offer a Sunday school for any children where we discuss the meaning of the story, or whatever. I'm mostly making it up.

So, during the service (There was around 20-25 people in the church) I was talking about the devil and temptation, blah blah, when the doors (Directly opposite the stage where I stand) flew open and a teenager runs in.I'd say she was like 15, maybe 16, and she was looking frantic, out of breath, a mess, essentially. She approached the christening bath(I don't know if that's is real name but that's what I've always called it) and started filling up water bottles. It's rather like that scene in "The lost boys".

I clear my throat and ask what she is doing, and she replies with "Demon hunting,don't worry," At first I laughed, but then I look at her and she's completely serious. So I go back to talking and don't mention it.

When the service was over, I went outside onto the street to get some fresh air and saw a police car parked outside a small cafe down the road. The police officer was talking to the girl who had just collected the holy water. Curious, I approached and listened in to the conversation. Apparently she'd thrown salt and holy water at people in the cafe accusing them of being Demons, and even tackled a man to the ground, screaming at him. She just kept insisting that they were Demons, and then she turned to me and asked "You're a Reverend, you must be able to see them!" I had no idea what to respond with so I just shook my head and glanced at the officer, who let her off with a warning but that now she was banned from the premises she would be arrested if she tried to go back in.

I recognised her then, she lived further out in the village in an isolated hamlet with her mother and younger siblings. I think her name is Star, or something. Or at least that's what I've heard people calling her.

That's it. I know it's somewhat mundane but it's the weirdest thing that's ever happened to me that relates to me being a reverend. Nothing that strange ever really happens here, sounds like some cliché but it doesn't. This is a village that's got a population of about 230 people, a small church and one shop. The most exciting thing in the last ten years was when they re tarmacked the main road into the village.

Sorry this post has nothing to do with misanthropy, I just wanted to share this. I felt bad for the girl, she's obviously suffering with something like schizophrenia. I haven't seen her since then, but I rarely leave the church grounds (Seeing as I live in a property attached to the church)

Yours "Sincerely" Vincent

(7) Comments

5:30pm

L-O-L-A: I definitely believe she was suffering from schizophrenia. I think demons are a common obsession from sufferers (Correct me if I'm wrong)

5:45pm

4156b: Bruh what if she really was seeing demons or some shit like that. You don't know, demons could be real

5:58pm

CptDavid replied to @4156b: What are you doing on a forum like this if you think there's a possibility that demons exist? Pretty much everyone here is an atheist or humanist,with the exception of @Jacktheo who is Jewish.

6:23pm

Jacktheo replied to @CptDavid: You tagging me in this made my phone go off in the middle of my families dinner and now my parents are ranting about how much they hate technology.

6:43pm

Urgone: Maybe she's just nuts. Wants to play pranks on people, or just to mess with people.

6:44pm

Blueeyedmr replied to @Urgone: Surely there's better ways to mess with people than throwing holy water in their faces...

7:14pm

Jessnutreplied to @L-O-L-A: My aunt has schizophrenia and she hallucinated that angel were after her. It got pretty out of hand and she used to carve symbols into her arms,convinced it meant she was hidden from them

4revgreen post history 28/02/19

8:10pm

4revgreen created a playlist

"Music that makes me feel"

8:11pm

4revgreen added 3 songs to "Music that makes me feel"

"Buttercup" by Jack Strauber

"Walla Walla" by Glass Animals

"For Reverend Green" by Animal Collective