To Love a Beast

The Knowing

There was a beat of silence after Cedric spoke.

When a beast of silence became two, Sin nudged him with a toe.

"Well?" she said.

Cedric felt his lips tug into a smile at her impatience.

The question regarding the bond Sin posed steeped in his mind all day. To think the bond he coveted so much was giving Sinclaire grief... was unfathomable to him. No matter, he wanted to give her some semblance of security; that was his first step to wooing his flighty mate.

Another nudge.

"Stop milking the tension of the room and just speak your mind. Unless you really don't have an answer?" Sin said with narrowed eyes.

"I don't like the answer I have for you. It's unnatural and demeans the bond—"

"Spit it out already."

My little tigress.

"Very well, but just bear in mind-" Sin fixed a glare at him.

Cedric sighed.

"The bond is more a physical connection than an emotional one. It ensures mates are sexually compatible, but it does not ensure a mating with emotional attachment," he said.

To him, a mating was more than physical intimacy and breeding and he didn't want his little mate getting the wrong idea. Cedric continued.

"Feeling cannot be forced. Love cannot be forced. When I first met you, I thought you were radiant, the most magnificent creature to bless my eyes, but I did not love you."

The fierceness in her eyes fled. A curious emotion appeared instead, one Cedric didn't dare interpret. He understood where he stood in their relationship and was determined to fight for her, even if he needed to hold on by the skin of his teeth.

But the silence unnerved him. Cedric yearned to hear her thoughts, to hear her soothing voice.

Cedric thought back to his words, not finding anything Sin could misinterpret. So caught up in his internal fretting, he almost didn't catch her whispered words.

"And how about now?" she said.

"Now?" Cedric asked before the meaning of her words dawned on him.

"Do you love me now?"

Sin's expression betrayed only a simple curiosity.

"You own me now, little mate," Cedric wanted to say, preferably against her skin so he could show her exactly how she owned him. But when his nether region twitched at the thought, he was quick to stamp out the curdling desire. Remembering how helpless he was during her panic attack extinguished the fire.

"Love is too small a word to describe what I feel," Cedric said, laying his palm atop his chest like in a pledge.

An emotion flitted across Sin's face. Fear. The emotion was fleeting but the fear was crystal clear and potent.

"You fear me," he said in a whisper. A pang struck his heart.

Sin straightened her spine in an indignant manner.

"I'm not afraid of you," she said, even as her grip on the duvet tightened.

"Yet you cower when I draw near, like now. You say you're not afraid even as you clutch the duvet like a lifeline."

Sin released her death grip on the sheets

"I'm not afraid of you. I just don't like feeling...cornered. I like my choices, my options. And you and this bond are the embodiments of what I don't want."