xix. rabbit hole

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what is your secret? when do you eat?
tell us how you manage this feat,
because all of us covet and all of us sin,
but none of us know how you stay thin.

well!

call me black coffee and cheap cigarettes,
measuring tapes and kate moss-led,
ten thousand steps and body checks,
because this is how i stay thin.

call me calories counted and kilograms shed,
vegan, skinny, sugar-free requests,
sighing for apples and greeting for bread,
because this is how i stay thin.

call me tired green eyes and shallow breaths,
tablespoons and double-checks,
ribs all counted and thighs far spread,
because this is how i stay thin.

call me nicotine buzzes and guilt and regret,
perpetual cold and scales reset,
always starving and never fed,
because this is how i stay thin.

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