Devotion (boyxboy)

Chapter 14

I knew something was off that day when I returned to our dorm room.  I was getting this feeling, almost like an itch that needed to be scratched but I had no idea where to scratch it.  Something had been off but I shrugged it off due to the stress of my situation at the time.  I cannot believe that I did not catch on at the time.  I am very observant but Keaton takes my ability to focus away completely.

Now we are sitting on my family's livingroom sofa, comfortably wrapped around each other.  I think my parents left to give us some privacy.  There are things that still need to be discussed.  As I find comfort in Keaton's arms that are currently wrapped around me, he says, "Balin, I have a question?"  I turn slightly in his arms to look at him as I acknowledge him with a, "Hmmm?"

He stares down at me lovingly and with a slight smile to his mouth watering lips he states, "I know you write under a penname but do you ever plan to reveal your indentity to the world, your fans?  There are so many of them out there.  You saw evidence of that when we stood in line at the bookstore awhile back.  Your writing inspires so many people.  You are it, a number one best selling author.  Was it ever in your plans to reveal yourself?"

Putting some thought into how I wanted to answer his question, I took a few moments to gather myself by sitting up so his arms would stop being a distraction.  He sits up as well so I turn to him and say, "Keaton you have to understand how all of this began.  I simply wrote.  It was an outlet for the feelings that at times overwhelmed me to the point of madness.  They say it is not healthy to keep things in but I had no one I felt I could trust with something so important to me.  I also wrote in order to understand my feelings for you."

I looked down as I entwine my fingers with his and I begin to feel emotionally full and continue, "I was coming to terms with my sexuality and I am sure you know first hand that can be traumatic at the best of times."  I look up into his eyes and he has tears gathering in them making them sparkle like the finest of jewels. "I never imagined that what I felt for you would be anything but unrequited and in all honestly that fueled my desire and gave me the strength to devote my whole heart to my craft."

"Then it became a quest to make some much needed money for school.  Being given the opportunity to be published I never thought that I would become so famous, that my wealth would give me the ability not just to accomplish all of my goasl but indeed take care of my family in almost every way."  I sigh deeply and I feel Keaton's hand gently caress my cheek.  "Baby, you aren't just rich and famous.  You are an international world famous author and yet no one knows you much less realize that you are not even eighteen yet.  Judging by this fame alone anyone can guess at the wealth you have amassed but I know you Balin, like no one else trully does.  I don't think it has hit you yet just what you have trully accomplished."

"I don't know if I am ready for the world to intrude in my private life.  I need time to just get used to the idea that you are here with me telling me that you love me that you are mine.  You have to understand that this was never a possibility in my mind so I never intended to put my given name on any of my works.", I responded.

Keaton takes my legs and wraps them around his waist so that I am straddling him and my breath hitches as our most intimate parts lightly graze each other.  I hear the stutter in his breathing and feel a satisfying smirk on my face as I think to myself, damn, I caused that to happen! I feel his arms wrap around my waist so I wrap mine around his neck and the next thing I know I am feeling Keaton's lips on mine.  His tongue is trying to spear it's way into my mouth and I open up happily for him knowing that all that I am belongs to him completely.

After a few minutes we both come up for air. "So the real question is are you ready to trully put yourself out there and let the world know who B. Dale really is?  No matter what decision you make I will be by your side.  I could never leave your side again.", he says to me.

Am I ready to take that step?  I look straight into his eyes, "Right now at this moment, I am not ready for that to happen.  I want some time with you away from prying eyes.  I'm still in shock that you are here.  Also my parents are just finding out as well about my true self and before I can let the world know who I am I need them to be on board because they will be affected by my fame.  You know this but the one thing you have to consider is this."

"What do I have to consider baby?", he asks me.  "My book is getting ready to release any day and I need the insanity of that event to be over before I introduce myself to the world.  This lastest novel is a work like nothing I have ever written before.  There is so much of me in it that I feel like I have bared my soul for my fans to read.  This is very terrifying for me! But again, most important is this, you said you read my draft.  Your opinion is the one that matters most to me because in the end I write to you.  So what did you think of it?"

For the first time I look into his eyes and there it is...