daomingsi, dongshancai.

shrimp

It was so unbelievably awkward.

She had stood up immediately after Si walked away after seeing her and Lei's kiss . . . and that kiss! It was . . . nice, she supposed. But it made her feel disappointed, no, sad, for some reason. She had expected something more, and she felt like she'd felt this sense of 'more' before. Now, though, it was replaced with a sense of loss as she suddenly felt like she'd lost that 'more'.

She looked back behind her.

Lei was still sitting on the beach floor, looking away from her into the tides, with his hand on his face where Si has punched him. As Si had left, he'd just sunk to the ground quietly. He looked as emotionless as usual, and she was wondering where the tenderness of just minutes before, before Si had interrupted them, had gone.

She realized, unsurprisedly: Lei was back to before.

The only sounds she could hear were the waves, rolling and crashing into the shore, washing over sand and rocks.

Shancai sighed, and started to walk back slowly to the hotel, as the sky seemed to grow darker, hoping she wouldn't see Si on the way back. His expression still played in her mind, haunting her. She scoffed, trying to forget about it, after all, why would his feelings matter to her? She hadn't even wanted to go on this trip, anyway, and there was no relationship between them . . . was there?

Still, she couldn't stop thinking about the betrayal she saw in his eyes, underneath all the anger and shock. As she ripped herself away from Lei, her eyes had been drawn to his fisted hands, and his tensed muscles. So different from Lei, who was all mysterious and soft, but emotionless, while he was hard and . . . handsome, yet so vulnerable, like this.

The wind with the smell of the sea breezed past her as she put a hand to her lips, imagining for a moment what it would've been like to kiss him, instead. For some reason, she felt he would be different than how he usually acted, more, she thought, gentle . . . what was she thinking.

She was almost at her room now, and her plan was to dash in, take her things, and run out of there, and then use up all her savings from working at the cafe for the plane ride back home. Shancai violently tried to distract herself, as her mind went back to that confusing sense of loss of something 'more'. She didn't know why, but it made her want to cry, and regardless of her effort not to, she thought of Si's face again, and she felt even sadder.

Suddenly, as she reached the hallway to the room, she bumped into something hard, and looked up, a sorry escaping her lips–

It was him.

She stared at him in shock and he turned away, trying not to look at her. A few seconds went by and he sighed, then pushed something hard into her hand. It was a box-like thing, maybe a container.

Shancai looked up at Si in confusion.

"Leftover shrimp," he muttered, and looked away again.

"T-thank you," she said, her voice breaking.

"Whatever." He looked pained. "We're leaving to the airport early tomorrow morning, around five, cause of the early departure."

". . . what?"

"You can't sit next to him, though."

"What! Daoming Si–"

"Where is he, anyway?"

"What? I–what do you mean? Lei? He's–I mean I think he's . . . still . . . at the beach. . ." her voice trailed off.

". . . you mean you just left him there?"

"Well, of course I did! What, did you want me to stay there?"

He ignored her. "You . . . you didn't do anything else?"

"Of course not!"

They both stared at each other, her breathing hard, as they paused outside the room door.

He was the first to look away. "Whatever," he said again. "It doesn't matter to me. You both can do whatever you want."

She didn't say anything, although his words pierced her like shards of ice.

He turned around in exasperation.

"Say something."

"No."

"You–!" he stopped himself. "No. No, I don't care."

A pause.

"And give me back the shrimp. I'm hungry."

"What! Why?–"

"I said I'm hungry."

"I will not! It's mine now, you can't take it back!"

"Give it–" he tried to wrench it out of her hand. "No!" She struggled, pulling it back, and somehow in the tussle, she ended up on top of him.

She met his eyes.

It was like time had stopped.

He looked strangely beautiful, and her heart was beating so fast it was almost painful. It was so, so different from how it was with Lei.

For a terrifying moment it looked like he was going to kiss her, and she closed her eyes, wondering what had taken over her body.

Then he pushed her, though gently, off of him. She let out a breath. "What . . ."

He opened the box. "You can have half. You're welcome."

". . . okay."

His lips turned up in a half smile, but then he immediately popped a piece of shrimp in his mouth, disguising his feelings.

"Here." He put a piece in her hand.

"Thank you."

She wasn't sure what she was feeling at that moment, as they watched the stars outside the hotel window, eating shrimp.

But she wasn't feeling like she was missing something 'more' anymore, she thought, as she smiled a little, savoring the salty sweet taste of shrimp.

She felt, she realized, whole.

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Author's Note: I couldn't update for a while cause of writer's block :( but then luckily I thought of this. I've never actually tasted shrimp, to those who have, is it good?

- coexistantLilli :D

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