The Seven Stages of Happily Ever After

Three

I hate Banner's Place. While I know it's unlikely snakes will be out in late September, it does nothing to squash my fear of them. I glance over at Izzy and Kyle as they make out on a rock to my left; I huff, my breath creating a small fog. I changed into jeans and a long sleeve tee so that I'd be warm but I'm still freezing; I blame it on my cold nature. Luke agreed to meet us here at eleven, and it's five minutes past; I try to ignore the fear that he could be standing me up, but it hangs over my head, ready to crush me.

There's always been this fear that resides in the deepest part of my mind; the fear that if my Mother couldn't love me, who ever could? It's a stupid fear because I know it wasn't my fault. Ellen had postpartum depression after I was born- it had nothing to do with me. Still. The fear grips me every time I even think about falling in love, or even dating someone. I don't see how anyone could want me, when I was unwanted by the one person who was supposed to love me, flaws and all. If she couldn't- who could?

My heart pounds as headlights flash, and I turn in anticipation, nerves fluttering around in my stomach as I prepare to see Luke again; until I notice the flashing lights.

"Izzy!" I shout, as I scramble off the rock, as the police car parks at the top of the hill. "We have to go!" I call to them, running over to Kyle's Jeep. They catch up just as I throw open the back door, throwing open the passenger side for Izzy so we can leave faster. Kyle surprises us as he slides across the hood of his Jeep as Izzy and I climb in, we settle in just in time to catch Kyle falling onto his side with a thump. He groans loudly in pain, before hopping up, and dashing into the driver's seat.

"Hey!" A male voice calls, a flashlight shining in his face just as he throws himself inside the Jeep, causing us to squeal.

"Go go go!" Izzy screams, motioning frantically for him to start the Jeep. He quickly does, throwing it into drive and tearing off across the field. I glance behind us, watching as the taillights show who the cop was. Harry Summers- my Dad's best friend and my godfather. His eyes catch mine, just as Kyle takes a sharp left; it's quiet for a moment, everyone breathing heavily, but then Izzy burst into laughter and Kyle and I join in.

"You slid across the hood!" Izzy squeals, holding her stomach as she laughs.

"It was faster." He laughs with us.

As he drives into the night, I forget about Luke, instead draped in the freedom of being seventeen and reckless.

I stare up at the ceiling, counting sheep in my head, willing sleep to come. I convinced Izzy to let me go home because I couldn't take seeing their cuteness after being stood up. She'd reluctantly agreed, worried over our cover story but I told her I'd say I was sick; which with how I've been feeling in the past hour isn't far off.

I can't believe I ever believed someone like Luke would like me. Everyone warned me not to get attached, and to simply have fun flirting but I had to go and invite him, obviously setting myself up for an embarrassment. Maybe he didn't even like me at all, maybe he was simply humoring a high school girl. Horror floods me as I wonder if he had a bet with his friend that Izzy hated; maybe it was a bet to see how long he could lead me on. I'm suddenly too hot. Heaving off my comforter, I slip my moccasins on my cold feet, and wander over to my window seat to sulk. It's early morning hours, close to two, and I'm not tired at all. Well, I am tired, but my mind isn't; it's working a mile a minute, stewing over every possibility of why Luke Rossi decided not to show up tonight.

My phone vibrates, and I sigh, walking over to my nightstand and looking down at it.

Cami: I've delivered something to your front yard. Look out the window in two minutes!

I raise a brow, preparing to text her back when a tap on my window causes me to spin around. Heart racing, I pad over to it, wondering if I should wake Matt so he can protect me from whoever's out there. Something tells me not to though, so I brave it myself, despite my shiver. I hesitantly pull the curtain back, squeaking in surprise when I see a figure standing in the front yard. He rubs his hands together, his breath causing a cloud in the air as he waves his hands at me. I drop the curtain, leaning against the wall as I fight to grasp the fact that Luke Rossi is standing on my lawn, waving me down to him.