Quantum Survivor

One Through Nine

It's been 2 months since I was left to care for the Doctor. He has gotten better.

By that, I mean he has his good days and his bad.

There were days I would take him to a planet and he wouls spout out facts about it, and there were days I couldn't even get him to open the door to his room - let alone talk to me. Today was the second type of day.

When I realized he wasn't in the chatting mood, I left to the kitchen to get him some tea and cake.

I was cutting a slicd of cake when I heard something shattering. I felt pain and looked to see my hand bleeding, the knife had slipped and cut my hands but I didn't care as I rushed to check in on the Doctor.

His cheeks were tear stained, "I'm sorry. I- I didn't mean to, it was an accident."

My heart shattered as he tried to pick up the broken cup, almost cutting his own hands.

I stopped him, "It was an accident. No need to be sorry, sometimes gravity takes effect and there is nothing we can do about it."

"But, but it was Susan's cup. Susan will be so mad, she loves this cup."

It hit me what was occurring. It happened when I was working at Torchwood. When people lost loved ones they would go into some sort of trace to forget about the missing chunk of their soul.

I swept up the glass but stopped when I heard the Doctor cry again, "I made you cut yourself! First I kill my kind, then I break Susan's cup, now I've cut your hand! I'm bloody useless!"

I patted my hands on the apron I had been wearing, "I'm okay. Tis but a scratch." I smile then look to the cup, "And Susan won't be mad. She would make some sort of art out of it. You know how creative she is." I knew I would just anger him by saying all the death wasn't his fault. So I tiptoed around the other subjects.

"It's not a scratch! I have enough blood on my hands, you don't need any on yours."

"Too late. Even before I met you I had blood on my hands."

The Doctor looked startled, "How do you mean?"

"My kind was involved in the Time War. I had saved people at the cost of so many others. But, those people that I did save, they grew and became better." I knew I should keep out the fact that I was a Time Lady. He didn't need to focus on the wrong type of hope. "My name I told you, Syria Moors, I chose it. It's an anagram, Im so sorry. Its the title I chose to attempt to make up for my sins."

The Doctor sighed, "What's my title then?"

"Do you seek forgiveness?"

He nodded.

"You are the Doctor." He went to interrupt, but I hushed him, "You will be the man who helps the beaten and broken. You will be the Warrior who fights for what is right, you are the man who pays for his sins by saving others from theirs."

He shook his head and started to panic, "How is a broken man supposed to fix other people?"

"Through experience."

He was beginning to hyperventilate.

"Spell One."

"W- w- what?"

"You heard me. Spell One."

He stuttered it out.

"Spell two."

He did, just as stuttery.

"Three."

He took a breath and spelt it out with fewer stutters.

"Four."

Same as with three.

"Five."

He was no longer stuttering.

"Six."

No stutter, but he sunk into my lap.

"Seven."

A small stutter at V, as he had sniffles.

"Eight."

He did.

"War."

He stuttered a lot on that one, but got through it.

"Nine."

He stuttered a bit but not as much as in War or three.

I smiled at him, "You just told me your entire life in Ten words. Eleven syllables and 39 total letters."

He looked up at me, confused.

"At One, you were confused. Just starting out, getting your bearings. Then by the fifth time you were able to get your bearings. Of course, you stumbled a little bit here and there, but life goes on. Then something random, scary happened and you got thrown off again. Right now, you are trying to get back on track. And that's okay. Cause everyone gets off track every once and a while, some people lose the track completely, but that's okay too. Cause you can build a new track, and life will go on."

I pecked his forehead, "You just have to build a new track, but don't worry. I will be there with the supplies you need."

"No one stays forever though."

"And by then you'll have someone else to give you the parts you need to fix the track. I am nothing special-"

"Bull!" He cut me off, offended that I would talk down to myself, "The Tardis summoned you here to help me. You have done more in two months for me than I did for myself in two years. If that isn't special, then nothing is."

I smirked, "There goes the Doctor, the broken man fixing the other broken."

"Syria Moors, the girl that sacrified everything to help planets and a stranger. You are no more a broken woman than the Tardis is an ordinary ship." He stood up, "You don't get to insult yourself or else you are insulting the last Tardis in the universe. She chose you to help. She chose you to bring here. That makes you a very special woman."

"She also chose you. She wanted to run away so she stole a Time Lord. Now look at you. Sitting in a corner on planet Earth, saving yourself. That'll be your most terrifying journey yet."

He nodded, "That life story I told you. It will expand, right?"

"One Through Nine. You'll never run out of numbers."

***