Pete Wentz + Broccoli: Part 4

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hey fellas welcome back it's been a year happy international pw+b day let's get on with this shitshow shall we? sksksks
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Pete and Patrick had gone forever without hearing... them...

The Foods...

Those darn pesky fruits and vegetables...

Of course, as most things don't, (especially when there is a story to be told) it couldn't last forever. Pete and Patrick were eating lunch together, something that had been almost completely uneventful for a whole year, when it happened. They heard... something?

No fruits or vegetables were even on the table, so both Pete and Patrick were confused as to what had called out to them.

"Hey, guys... Don't eat us!!"

"Oh God. No. Please, no!" In a Michael Scott-like outburst, Pete realised what had happened. He had more experience with talking foods than Patrick so it made sense that he would pick it up first.

Their pizza, Pete and Patrick's precious pizza... was talking!

"How do we get this to stop?" Patrick begged, he had now also realised what the voice 'in his head' was his lunch. "This can't happen again, can it?"

Pete knew it could, the last time he had heard food speak it had been a whole year before they had shut up. Still, how could he tell Patrick this? So young, so innocent, this talking food was too much for the pair to take.

"You can't eat me," said the pizza, "I'm your favourite pizza! Why do you want to eat me? Would you eat your best friend?"

Now standing on his chair, hands over his ears, Patrick yelled, "Pete!! You chose this pizza, it's covered in pepperoni!! This is your fault!!"

"No, it isn't!" Pete responded, getting a little frustrated, but also feeling bad since he definitely had chosen the pizza himself, "I don't remember what we have to do to make it go away, what do we do?"

"Why do you want me to go away?" the pizza asked, "If I stop talking then you're going to eat me!! That's mean I'm not going to stop talking!!"

"Stop talking!" shouted Patrick, still up on his chair. Pete paced around the kitchen rapidly as he tried to remember what happened the last time they could hear food.

After a while, the pizza had gone cold. This didn't mean it had gone quiet though, in fact, it was almost the opposite. Pete and Patrick had moved into the living room for some peace, but they could still hear the pizza screaming at them. They chose to ignore it while they gathered their thoughts.

"I've got it!"

Pete and Patrick both exclaimed in unison as they remembered! To get the pizza to shut up and be eaten, they had to remember the most important lesson of all! They can eat any food in moderation, and they have to remember their friendship is the most important thing of all!

"Please, no!! Don't eat m-" CRUNCH!

Pete and Patrick both bit down on their slices of pizza, glad that they couldn't hear its screams. A bit morbid, sure, but the two of them had been plagued by talking food for the past 3 years now, so not being able to hear it was peaceful.

They were both sure this was the end. Never again would they hear their food's starchy voices, they would be able to eat in peace once again. At least...

Until the next time ;)
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thanks guys! I'm glad there are still people reading this after so long :D I'm sorry this has come late in the day, but I got it out!!
hope you like this part! happy pw+b day!!

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