He Gave Me Hope

You Are The Reason

A/N: hello guys, first off I wanna say thank you so much for reading it means a lot to me. Second I would like to say that I will be writing this fic mainly from Dean's prospective but there will be times that I switch to Cas' just because it'll keep the emotion alive and we will get to see the things Cas is feeling as well. This chapter is going to be in the prospective of Cas. Thanks for reading xx

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When Cas woke up in the morning, he nearly rolled off his bed but he caught himself by putting his hand against the side table. Slowly he shifted so that he was back on the bed, rolling over onto his back into the middle of the bed. He sat up quickly, once he realized he was alone in bed, sighing softly as he rubbed his eyes, of course he didn't stay the night with me. Cas hadn't really put much hope in Dean staying the whole night, but for some reason it still stung a bit, and he sighed heavily, as he pushed the blanket back. He climbed out of his bed, walking to grab some clothing to slip on from his closet, but once he opened the door memories flooded back from months ago.

***3 months ago***

"Honey are you almost ready, we need to be at the adoption center in 15 minutes." Cas shouted from in the bathroom to his husband who had been in their bedroom. There was no reply and Cas sighed softly as he walked out into their bedroom. "Ash, hon did you...? What's the matter lover?" Cas rushed to his husbands side, he had tears on his cheeks, "are you nervous?" Ash laughed softly as he looked at his hands, "I have nothing nice to wear, I mean we're going to adopt a baby for hell sake, you'd think I'd have something fancy to wear." Cas chuckled softly as he pulled Ash into a tight embrace gently pressing his lips to the top of his husband's head, "oh honey, I don't think it's that important."

Ash laughed at Cas comment pulling back from him, angling his body toward Cas, as he took his hands into his own, "it's important to me lover. This is our family, our life, I just want it to be perfect." Cas rolled his eyes as he held his husband's hands, squeezing gently, "it already is perfect." Ash lifted his eyes toward Cas, a wide smile starting at the corner of his mouth, as he reached his hand up to caress Cas on his cheek, "you keep me on the ground with your sweet words, I love you." Placing his hand over the top of Ash's, Cas smiled leaning into the touch then he stood up, "I love you too and I think I got something for you my love." Cas stood up from the bed walking to the closet pulling out one of his favorite button down shirts, holding it against his chest.

"How about this?" Cas glanced up at Ash, who had been staring at Cas with a look of intense passion, "what is it?" Ash slowly rose from the bed, walking up to stand in front of Cas, wrapping his arms around his waist, "you are just so wonderful, always having the solutions when I'm not thinking rationally, it's one of the many thousands of reasons I love you." Cas lowered the shirt letting it fall to the floor as  he threw his arms around Ash, "I love you more than anything on this planet lover." They shared a deep passionate kiss, before Cas reached down to retrieve the shirt and gently pressed it to his husband's chest, "get dressed we are going to be late."

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Cas sighed heavily as he reached into his closet, touching the fabric of the shirt, he was sure it still had Ash's scent on it. Pulling it from the hanger, Cas stepped back until he was sat on the bed, clutching the shirt against his chest with his nose pressed against it, god I miss you so much. Cas dropped his hands, the shirt now resting in his lap, he slowly pulled the shirt onto his body buttoning it up, it was a little tight, and now he remembered why he gave it to Ash in the first place. Carefully, he unbuttoned his shirt slipping it off, settling to just put on some pajamas, then he went downstairs into the kitchen.

Cas sighed softly as he pulled things from his fridge so he could make himself breakfast Everything felt so different now, now that Ash was gone. The thing that happened between him and Dean had been a temporary fix, in fact he was fairly certain that he wouldn't be seeing Dean again, he hadn't even bothered to spend the night with Cas. He couldn't really hold it against Dean though, being that Dean was essentially a man of the night, one that pays for sex, and that's just not Cas. Admittedly, Cas wanted Dean to be here, so he could make breakfast for him. Maybe if I invite him over he'll come.