Chaotically Neutral

Chapter 4

Amaryllis was leaned again the side of the small cave she called her home, staring down at the giant lump of dirt that was her bed. This was just the typical type of living conditions that she had grown accustomed to, and it wasn't like she had lived in a castle in any point in time to make it seem like an even worse place to call home.

The sad thing was, however, that this wasn't even the bottom of the economic scale. Some people her age still had to bunk together in fairly sized rooms of three or four people until the people they worked for held their hand through the getting a job process.

How those types of people managed to live life without the luxury of being in the calm and quiet of your own little peaceful place was a mystery to her.

A smirk made its way across her lips as she flipped on a prehistoric light switch that set off an overcomplicated chains of events with the end result of a small spark being ignited. The flame caught hold of the tip of a candle that was hanging in a wooden chandelier. The light that it emitted was dim, but the young adult knew that complaining about every little broken aspect of your life wouldn't lead you anywhere.

She moved herself from the wall and walked to a small wooden cage she had crafted in the corner, bending down and staring at the family of mutated insects she held captive.

"Don't you think it's funny how some people who see you as nothing but a cruel monster can have their entire perception of your personality changed just by a quick glance at your home life?" Amar asked one of the larger bugs, sticking her hand inside the cage and softly grabbing it to bring it outside the mini prison. "Most people with horrible living conditions become more empathetic towards other people's problems, because it helps them cope with their own crippling lifestyle."

She held the bug up closer to her face, getting a good look into its giant, fly-like eyes. Her smile was ever menacing, but the bug just stared up at her without even a trace of emotion. It was nothing surprising, of course, as most of the animal kingdom wasn't capable of thinking about anything other than who they were going to kill next to obtain their next meal.

Amar opened her mouth to continue talking to the bug, but then lost interest in whatever she was going to say. Her smiled dropped, and she lowered the insect back in with its happy little bug party. She stared at them for a while, wondering what it would be like if she were a bug with them.

It would be nice to know for even a second what having a family felt like, as everyone that had one seemed to only talk about how wonderfully wonderful it was. She didn't know if any of their claims were true, as she was one of the accidental seedlings that came in from the wind out in the middle of nowhere.

She hadn't been lucky like most of the others with a similar story and had been able to find a nice nursing home like the Oops house. But she didn't really care.

You can't feel pain unless you know what pleasure feels like, right?

Catching herself in a funk of self-pity, she shook her head to get all thoughts about how she would be viewed as a tragic character by a large portion of the population and decided instead to lie down on the softest part of her dirt bed and close her eyes until the familiar chemical that put her to sleep ran through her body.

*********

Waking up wasn't difficult at all, as the wind ran through the small cracks of the only wooden wall she had placed at the entrance and she had been practicing the procedure all throughout the night. Now that it was morning, the air wasn't the only thing seeping through—sunlight was squeezing its way through the small open spaces and was shining on her eyes.

She opened them grudgingly and then began to photosynthesize what little light she could get before turning. Amar made a quick goodbye motion towards the bugs in the corner, her devilish grin widening at the sight of them trembling in their prison.