My Ghost

twenty-six

ray's point of view

"Come on, focus!" Jason exclaims from across the room.

I nod, closing my eyes and easing my breathing. I set my feet shoulder width apart and outstretch my arms, facing my palms toward him. I open my eyes and I nod as he throws the empty soup can at me. I put all of my energy and focus into it, attempting to stop the projectile. I watch as it nears me and grit my teeth, why could I not stop this simple thing, but I could easily stop the bullets?

The can bounces off of my chest and falls to the floor at my feet. I drop my arms in defeat, kicking the can angrily and watching it roll away from me.

"I can't do it!" I exclaim, exasperated.

"Yes you can, come on Ray," Jay says, walking over to put an arm around me. "You just have to figure it out."

"I don't know how to do that, Jay!"

"Maybe just don't think about it? Just let instinct take over," he suggests.

"Or just give up," I mumble, looking away from him.

"Why would you give up? The Ray I know never quits."

"The Ray you know doesn't have powers," I snap at him. "I just- these are incredible, but I don't want them. I don't want these... things that Luthor and Roman planted here."

"Hey," Jason says sternly, his gaze hardening, "they may have come from those pricks but Luthor and Sionis never owned them. These powers were never theirs to hand out. You earned these, you went through hell being taken by them, and you came out so much stronger."

"Stronger would imply that I was strong in the first place," I mumble to myself, replaying my fall in the back of my mind over and over.

Jason opens his mouth to say something but is cut off by the sound of my phone ringing. I reach into my pocket and check the caller ID, it's my father.

"Hey," I answer, not attempting to mask the disappointment in my voice.

"Hi honey! It's been a bit since I've heard from you, I just wanted to call and check in on you," he says, his voice chipper.

"I'm good, I've just been spending a lot of time readjusting, I'm sorry we haven't spent much time together," I apologize, and I mean it. My father went through Hell while I was gone and I've barely paid any mind to him.

"It's okay! I understand that it's going to take time to feel safe again. I was just wondering if you wanted to come to an event with me? There's a dinner this Friday in honor of Harvey Dent, I would love it if you felt comfortable enough to accompany me."

"I would love to," I answer, instantly regretting it. The last thing I want is to be surrounded by politics, but I also knew how much it would mean to him for me to be there.

"Wonderful!" he exclaims, clearly shocked by my response. "I hope to see you soon."

"You will," I promise, hanging up the phone.

"That your dad?" Jason asks, his arms folded across his chest as he leans against he wall of his apartment.

I nod, sliding the phone into the pocket of Jason's sweatpants I'm wearing. "He invited me to some dinner this Friday. I didn't want to let him down."

"If you told him you weren't up for it he would've understood," Jason tells me.

"I know, but I haven't spent much time with him, and maybe I need to get back into the swing of things," I say, walking across the room to pick up the soup can I had kicked. "Maybe I just need a break from all the crazy, maybe I just need to be his daughter right now."

"Do whatever is best for you," Jay says, walking over and extending his hand for the soup can. "I'll always support you."

I smile at him before taking a few steps back, stretching out my arms one last time. "Last one, if I can't get it then I give up."

Jason chuckles. "Yes ma'am."

He swings his arm back and tosses the tan underhand. I watch it carefully, and it almost feels as though everything is moving in slow motion. I take a deep breath, keeping myself relaxed as I push my palm forward... and the can falls to the ground in front of me.

"Holy shit," I mutter, looking up at Jason.

He smiles and shakes his head, "You really are something else, Ray."

"What did I just do? Some kind of force field?" I ask, bewildered as I stare down at my fingertips.

"That's what it seems to be, yeah. That and your speed, no normal human being can run that fast."

"The serum was meant for the Amazo-like clones that held the powers of the Justice League members. Speed would be Flash, what would the field be?" I question aloud.

"No idea, but it's pretty badass either way," Jason comments, chuckling to himself.

"This is epic," I laugh, staring at my fingertips. These powers were incredible, I could do so much more now, I could be so much more.

"You are incredible," Jay smiles, pulling me in for a hug. "I'm glad you're warming up to these abilities."

"You were right," I say into his ear. "Sionis and Luthor may have given me these, but they don't decide what I become- how I use them."

"Exactly, you are nobody's but your own, you hear me?"

I kiss him on the cheek and smile at his kind words. Today was the first day where I've felt fully okay, despite the events of last night. I can breathe and relax, and for the first time I feel completely at ease.

It won't last, but I'll take it while I've got it.