DREAMS OF FAITH

Three

She stared at her reflection in the vanity mirror. The girl looks dull and sad in her eyes. Her frown seems to be fasten on her face permanently. Her eyebrows are knitted together and dark circles are starting to form under her eyes.

I look like a mess.

She sighed again and combed her wet hair. The itchy sensation on her skin is still there but not too much.

What a night.

She couldn’t expect Sonny to say something like that to her. It sounded so cruel and insensitive of him knowing her past.

Stop it. He didn’t meant to say what he said. He’s clearly hurt and he saw you as someone who he can take out his anger.

She can’t sleep. Her tired eyes seemed to be begging her to rest but she just couldn’t. Not after what happened.

I’m so fucking tired of being compared to you, Megan! You made me feel like a loser all the time… and then you came along Faith. Making me feel even worst. Why do you have to be as good as Megan?! Huh!” the emotions to his words are too much to bare.

He stood up from the rock he was sitting on to face them. His bloodshot eyes held hers with accusing stares.

“I know you’re in pain.. but-“ I tried but was cut of by his booming voice.

“You … you knew I was in pain?” His laughing face held the opposite emotions. “Really? You knew?” He stopped laughing and faced her completely. “ You knew nothing. Nothing. You have no idea how I fucking felt when you had all of her attention instead of me!” he yelled

“Stop it, Sonny. Don’t put all the blame on her. It wasn’t her fault either”. Megan said quietly.

This is not the Sonny she knew in that 7 years of living with the Saldello family. The Sonny who’s in front of her now is a stranger, a very angry stranger. She couldn’t know how to approach him without angering him even more.

“No! It’s her fault!  If only she didn’t come to our family 7 years ago. Nothing of this will happen and I probably still be happy. And don’t you dare tell me I’m wrong,  aren’t you jealous of her too? She’s getting all of Mom’s attention more than you! More than us!” he frustratedly combed his hair in annoyance.

I felt like someone had punched me in the guts, making me feel sick. I didn’t know. It wasn’t her intention.

Megan’s jealous of me.

Megan froze and didn’t dare to look my way. As if sensing my curious stares on hers.

Her blank face answered all of my silent question. Sonny was right.

Why does she didn’t notice it?

“That’s not it, Sonny. Please, stop it. We’re not you’re enemy” Megan tried again. She had taken a few shallow steps towards him, hands up in the air like she was caught by the police.

“No, no. Of course not, she’s OUR enemy Megan”, he yelled while pointing at her.

“You shouldn’t have come to our family! You should’ve just died! Because that was your fate!” he roared before turning his back on them and leaving them speechless.

He’s right again. Maybe if she wasn’t too dependent on her, then this won’t be happening. And… if she didn’t arrive in their lives 7 years ago, then maybe… just maybe, Sonny and Megan weren’t going to suffer in silence.

They found Sonny on the clearing seemingly deep in thought when they arrived. Relieved, she called him only to be met by a hostile and unapologetic glares.

She sighed. After their confrontation, Sonny left them speechless. Coming back here is a blur to her. She couldn’t remember exactly how they managed to get back here without notifying any of the guards on patrol in the area. Megan had dragged me with her noticing my shock expression.

“Don’t take him seriously. He vents his anger towards you seeing that you’re his easiest target”, Megan said before leaving her standing in front of the staircase.

She doesn’t know how many minutes she just stood there, staring nothing in particular. She won’t be coming back to her senses if not for Sonia.

“Are you just going to stand there ‘til morning?” her voice is harsher than usual. There’s something different in her eyes tonight. Pain.

“You shouldn’t be here”, she continued when I didn’t say anything. She paused in front of me looking intently as if searching for something. As if she’s waiting for me to do something, anything.

She frown and left without saying anything more when I didn’t react in any way. I don’t want to dwell with her annoying riddles right now. I felt so drained, so tired.

I didn’t know that I will be tired ..  just being me.