Venus [BARRETT]

FOUR

ALL OVER THE PAVEMENT

☼

"Listen, thank you for the drink."

Syd was walking beside me, almost seeming to bounce along the foot path.

He smiled at my words, appearing embarrassed that I was even thanking him. "No worries," he told me. 

We both fell into a puddle of silence again and I pressed my bag against me. It was nearing six o'clock, and I wondered if Tom was at the house yet.

"Is that A Holy Night?"

Looking down into my bag, I saw that my library book's spine was still visible from in my bag, despite my hurried shoving it down into the depths.

"It is," I said, "it's another one of my favourites. It's a new edition though. . . It has a new chapter that the others don't."

"I've read it, too," Syd added. "Very dark. Sad. Sometimes it feels like my only home."

My heart warmed at the words and, suddenly shy, I glanced at Syd, hoping that he didn't see the expression of awe that flashed across my face. He was facing forward, however, watching a few birds that had landed on the park bench a few metres ahead.

"The book feels. . . blue," he continued. "And I know it's stereotypical to associate sadness with the colour blue, but. . . it's the kind of blue you can just pick up and eat." He flashed a smile at me, most likely assessing my reaction to his words.

I was quiet; listening. He was right — it was true. So true I wanted to reach out and touch him. I wanted to feel what he felt and twist my life around his. To look over his delicate features in close, clear study. The shape of his nose and its sharp slope. His cheeks and their hollow structure. His long eyelashes that caught the dull street lamp light and sent it dancing in the green of his irises.

"I think maybe I should just take the bus," I said, stopping my footsteps.

Syd stopped too and faced me. "What do you mean?"

I can't be near you because I feel like you're somebody I should love, the voice in my head screamed.

But instead, my mouth formed the words: "well, my boyfriend might be home. And it's getting dark."

Syd's sweet, crystal eyes softened a little and he shrugged. "So what? I'd rather walk you up to the building than leave you on the street."

Some of his dark strands pushed across his forehead in the wind and I couldn't help but stare at him, again. He was a dark silhouette painted across a pink and blue sky, quickly becoming dark.

"Uhm, my boyfriend will not be pleasantly surprised to see. . . you," I reasoned.

In truth, I knew a lot more than I felt good admitting to myself. I just wanted to get rid of Syd before he said anything more and I exploded in the sky like a firecracker.

"Are you sure?" He moved a little closer — closer than we had been in the cafe.

"It was my fault I didn't drive my car," my hands smoothed out my hair in the wind. "It was really good talking to you. Getting to know you."