The Girl and The Murderer

9. Rachel The Nurse

-Zack ? Everything's alright ? You're crying.

Two teardrops fall on his bandaged cheeks. While I wipe them away, I notice that he's burning.

-Zack... Please answer me...

His stare is blank. His face is hot. Far too hot.

-Zack, I'll have to take off your bandages. Is that ok ?

He doesn't answer. He seems to drawn in his thoughts. Guess I won't wait for his reply then. It's a case of absolute necessity ! I start to unwarp the bandages. The skin is burned and leaks here and there. I concentrate hard not to puke.

-I understand why you've got that fever...

I drag Zack into my room and put him on the bed, panting slightly. I let him here and go look for gauze and fresh bandages. Passing the bathroom, I take a basin and fill it with warm water.

When I go back to my room, he fell asleep. I put the basin down and sit on the ground next to the bed.

-You're making me move around... I hope you'll get well soon.

I clean and dress the wounds and wait. I wanted to give him some medicine against the fever he keeps his mouth totally closed.

After half an hour of waiting on the ground, I go get Zack's clothes.

An hour passes, then two... Zack doesn't wake up. His fever has lowered but his forehead is still hot. He starts to move a little and he sits up eagerly, like he just escaped from a nightmare.

-Where am I ? And why do I wear only my boxers ?

I smile with relief as I hand him the rest of his clothes.

-Thank you Rachel for staying by my side when I was weakened by a high fever, I say sarcastically.

He looks at me, a vacant expression on his face. The moment after he seems to concentrate hard. I know why. He heard the footsteps in the staircase.

-Hide under the bed. He won't notice you.

He obeys without arguing. I turn the lights off and hide under the blankets. Just after, I notice the old bandages and the gauze are still on the ground. "Don't turn on the lights. Don't turn the lights on please !"

-Dearie ? Are you still awake ?

I don't answer and hide even more under the blankets.

Lenny laughs and go to bed. I hear strange noises coming from his bedroom but I don't pay much attention. I sigh heavily and get out of bed.

-Zack... You want the bed ?

He doesn't say anything but grab my ankle.

-And where you gonna sleep ?

-On the floor. Are you worried about me ?

I smile in the dark. I' m really pleased to hear that Zack is caring about me. But I don't understand why.

-Go for the change then...

And he gets up.

In fact, there is enough space for two in that bed. Zack notices it and shakes his head. I think he's wondering what to do with me...

-Silly. If you think that I gonna steal your bed like that... And we already sleep together once, remember ?

I'm flustered. I didn't expect such a reaction from him. I didn't really expect an answer in fact.

Without any sound, Zack gets into bed, puts his arms under his head and looks at the ceiling thoughtfully.

I join him but stay as far from him as I can. I know it's totally dumb and I can't pull myself against him like a giant teddy bear can I ?

-Thanks for changing the bands. They started to be kinda old.

-You should clean your injuries better. And clean yourself more often. If not, the infection will expand and you're gonna die in one or two weeks.

He laughs softly and turns his head to me. He seems so carefree right now.

-What's the point in living ? We're born to die after all right ? A little sooner or later, what's the difference ?

I look at him, missing the point. Does he want to die ? I don't believe it. If so, why did he struggle so many times at the orphanage ?

-You... You really mean it ? You really wanna die ?

He takes a short time to think before answering :

-No. I wanna live. I wanna live so bad that I kill people to survive, to gain a day or two in this world.

I hug him tightly. I don't really want to do it, it's just a kind of reflex. He shivers a little when my hair encounters his cheek.

I stay awake the whole night. Zack succeeded to fall asleep at almost 6am. I watch him sleeping. He seems so peaceful and innocent. It's impressive how much sleep can transform people. The sleeping person looks weaker, nicer and cuter than she is normally.

At 7am, Lenny knocks at my door. I pass my head through the door and tell him that I dress myself up. He simply nods and goes downstairs.

I put my clothes on quickly and go say hello to Lenny before taking my breakfast. I go back upstairs to prepare my bag for school when I hear :

-Hey darling, had a good sleep ?