Always on the Run

2. Trying to do the right thing

Hi guys, here is the new chapter. Thanks for your support so far. I hope you enjoyed the first chapter. Hold onto your seats, the journey is only just beginning. ;) thanks again and enjoy!

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The whole way home I try not to think about Jamie but it’s impossible. What’s happening to him? Are the police interrogating him? What evidence do they have against him? What else could he have done?

Remembering he had a meeting with his lawyer recently, I begin to wonder if it’s connected. How did the meeting go? Has Jamie done something to break some sort of contract?

The desire to turn around and make a trip to the police station is strong. All I want to do is barge in there and demand to know what’s going on. Obviously know better though. I have no idea what’s happening and I could ruin everything.

By the time I arrive home I’m too distraught to think straight so decide to hold off calling Julian until tomorrow.

Unfortunately the thoughts that haunted me on the trip home keep my mind active all night. When I go to bed nothing changes and they keep me awake instead. Round and round my head they go. All I can do is toss and turn. When I do fall asleep from exhaustion, my sleep is restless and I wake every hour.

Finally when morning comes around I feel like an emotional wreck. It’s only five but I know there’s no point in trying to sleep anymore. Rather than doing anything productive like shower or have breakfast, I end up pacing my bedroom floor.

I’m not sure how much time passes but my stomach rumbles, telling me it’s time to eat and this knocks a little bit of life into me. I can’t just mope around forever. I have no idea how long it will be until I see Jamie again so I have to do something.

After making myself some breakfast, I sit down at the table and start eating. The truth is, the last year of my life has been full on. I’ve done some stupid things and I’ve been confused…a lot. Perhaps this is a good time to pull myself together and make sure I’m certain of what I’m doing.

Happy with this thought, I finish my breakfast then get up and wash my dishes. When I’m done I feel a little better about things and decide to ring Julian. I’m determined to stick to my decision. I can’t lead him on anymore. I care for him a great deal and I think I really do love him. I can tell that by how I feel when I’m in his arms or he kisses me, but I’m not in love with him. Being in love is the most important thing.

Having a sudden burst of confidence, I pick up my phone and dial his number. It’s only as it starts to ring that I begin to feel nervous. I’ve never been good at confrontation. Taking a deep breath, I release it slowly as it continues ringing. I can do this.

I sit on the sofa just as he answers. “Teresa?” he asks, sounding a little too eager.

“Hi, can we talk?” I ask. I probably shouldn’t be so blunt but I fear if we start talking normally I’ll chicken out.

“Uh, sure. Now? Or do you want to meet up?”

“Um now is fine. Look it’s just…” I release a sigh and run my free hand through my hair. This is harder than I thought. “Look, Julian I don’t think—”

“Don’t say it,” he interrupts.

“What?”

“Please, just don’t say it. I know what you’re going to say and I don’t want it to come to that. We can make it work. I’m sorry if I’m too full on, it’s always been my problem. I can work on it. Just don’t say the words.” He’s talking so quickly I can barely make out the words.