Imperfect Perfect Love

Chapter 3

I left my house and went to the place where I could find peace and that place was the hospital. Yes she was my peace, even when she was on her hospital bed she gave me peace. I went straight to her room and before I could enter someone stopped me from behind from entering.

" what do you think your doing here?" a manly voice wispered and  immediately knew who it was. It was sam her best friend
" I came here to just see her once" i replied with desparation.
" No! You cannot enter inside she's out of the comma now so you better know what to do."
I was both happy and sad after hearing this. I was sad because I couldn't see her everyday now they way I used to for past one month and happy that she was finally out of that dreadful condition. I just wanted to get a glimpse of her and know how she was doing but I couldn't beacause I know what harm it'll do to her and i have done enough already.
I left from there with my head bent down in defeat and just started walking. I wanted to yell her family for not telling me that she was out but I had no rights. If I was in same position as theirs I wouldn't have said myself.
I was about to lose it and on verge of breaking down. I needed her to hold me and tell me that everything will be fine, i needed her to yell at me for being such a coward, i needed her to smack me so that I could be out of my negative thoughts, to hold me , to love me, to save me from my own demons but she wasn't there...
I lost everything, I lost the one who had hope in  me after everything, I lost the one who fought for me, the one who loved the darkest side of me, who never asked anything in return , she was the only one who could calm me and bring me out of this vulnerable stituation , she was the only one who could fight and protect me from my own demons. I let her go just like that let her slip away through my fingersand now I'm truly utterly defeated and  nothing in this world can help me win her back.