What do you do when your best friend lies to you? What do you do when you feel so done with everything? I'm done being the girl who is all happy on the outside. I'm done being the girl who they think is the one they can just run over. I'm done being the one they lie to. Because I cant do this anymore. I cant keep pretending I'm okay when I'm not. I cant keep acting like nothing hurts me. Because deep down inside things hurt like hell. And sometimes theres days where I just want to be left alone. Theres days where I want to be in silence. Theres days where I just wish everyone would leave me alone. Because I dont trust anyone. And when I tell someone how I feel it will always start something. I can't wait until just one day I can actually trust someone and them not lie to me. I cant wait until I can just tell someone how I feel and them not get mad or tell me to calm down. I want people to stop lying to me. It will never kill them to be honest with me. But people dont seem to get that. Because lying to someone is worse than telling them the truth. Telling them the truth gains trust. But it will take time to gain the trust you once had with someone. It takes forever to gain trust. But will always take a second to break it and lose it all. I cant keep acting like my best friend isnt stabbing me in the back. I can't keep acting like I'm all happy. I'm not going to keep pretending I'm someone who loves life. Because I'm so tired of living at this point. I don't know what to do. I'm tired of loving. I'm tired of trusting. I'm tired of believing people because they have always let me down. I'm tired of hoping because nothing ever happens. I'm done seeing the good in people because there is nothing good in someone if they do bad things. My best friend doesn't tell me shit. Which makes me wonder why I even bother with trying to help her. I'm just done. I need to focus on myself for a little while.
