Dear Nan and Grandad. Chapter 5:

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Dear Nan and Grandad,

I miss you so much. I want you to know that wherever you are, whatever you're doing, no matter what's going on, that I love you. I never told you this properly, and I feel guilty everyday. I know that you know that I love you, even though I almost never said it. I want to thank you for all you have given me, and all you have done for me. You meant the absolute world to me. When I found out Grandad died, it was completely different to when Nan died, because with Grandad, I hadn't experienced it before. I didn't know how to react. But with Nan, I knew exactly what was going on. I was equally heartbroken during both passings, and I still am. There's that saying, 'you don't realise how much you love someone until they're gone', and that could not be more true. I did not realise how important you are to me, or how much I love you, until you left. You were, and still are, two of the most amazing people that I know. I hope that someday I will have a better understanding of your passing, and why you left. Because right here, right now, in the present, I don't have a single clue. I am trying to get a hold of the thought that you're gone, because it is quite a hard thing. I don't understand why you had to leave so soon. I don't understand where you've gone. But, in contrast, you do not understand how much I love you and how much you mean to me and how much I miss you and how much I appreciate you. I love you.

Lorna xxx

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