Chapter 19 ♱

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Chases PoVI wanted to care, but I couldn't

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Chases PoV
I wanted to care, but I couldn't.
Katherine had been in labour for 2 hours now and the doctors said she wouldn't give birth for another 10 at this rate. I knew she wanted me here, wanted me to stay with her. I wanted to, I wanted to be excited, I wanted to be happy but all I could feel was disappointment and regret, it flooded my mind every single minute. I watched Oscar kill that man, I heard his children's screams and there mother cry's. I did nothing to stop it and now his life is gone. I got my £2000 but now I didn't want it, it was dirty money and it would always remind me of how I got it, but I knew she wanted this house, she needed it. I tried to shake myself out of it, Natasha walked out of Katherine's room to talk to me.
"Chase."
"What?"
"Why are you doing this? Today." She asked.
"It's hard to explain." I shrugged
"Fine, can you at least go buy some baby-grows?"
I nodded.

I drove down to the nearest supermarket, it was very quiet, obviously since it was about 1am now.
There was about 5 people in the store and hardly any staff. I looked around aimlessly trying to find baby clothes until someone noticed I looked lost.
"Can I help you?" A woman came over to me.
"I'm looking for baby grows."
"Right over here." She lead me to an isle.
"Thank you."
"Do you think you'll be okay now?" She laughed.
"Actually, I don't know what size to get."
"Oh, well how old is this baby?" She smiled.
"She's not born yet but she's going to be early."
"Aw bless, get the lowest size." She smiled.
"Thank you."
She walked away.
I looked at all the baby grows, they were so small and tiny. It made me a little upset, I should be with Katherine right now, I should be taking care of her, and here I am sulking in a store. I grabbed 3 pink baby grows, one of them being a dinosaur one, I couldn't help myself. I payed and honestly they were over priced, I only got three and it cost me £15.
I drove back up to the hospital where Natasha was waiting for me outside.
"Finally!" She shouted.
"I'm sorry, I couldn't find them." I handed her the bag.
"No Chase, you should give them to her." She sighed.
"Oh okay." I frowned, I didn't want to see her right now.
I walked into her hospital room, she was all alone.
"Hey." I put the bag on the floor.
"Hi.."
she had a needle in her arm and was breathing heavily.
"What's the needle for?" I asked.
"Epidural."
"Okay." I said awkwardly.
The conversation was none existent.
She began to breathe more I intensely and grabbed my arm, her nails digging into my skin.
"Are you okay?" I was worried.
"Just another contraction." She moaned.
"Okay." I looked at her, it wasn't nice to see her in so much pain.
My phone vibrated in my pocket. I pulled my arm away from her and pulled out my phone.
It was a text from Oscar.
"Enjoy your money, I know Katherine will like it."
I panted.
"What is it chase?" Katherine asked.
"Nothing."
"Please stop being distant with me, we were in such a good place and now our baby is coming!" She began to sob.
"I'm sorry"
"Please." She whipped her eyes.
"It doesn't matter okay, I'll be here for you and the baby" I reassured her.
She smiled.
A doctor came in and smiled at us.
"We have some news for you"
"Yes" Katherine held my hand.
"Your baby seems to be perfectly healthy at the moment but is only 32 weeks old."
Katherine sighed.
"What's going to happen? Won't she be tiny?"
"Yes she will, but not too small, just like a smaller version of a fully grown baby." He smiled.
Katherine smiled.
"However, she will have to stay in the NICU for a few weeks."
"Of course" Katherine agreed
"Okay, well I'll get a midwife in to come check on you." He waved as she walked out.
Katherine looked at me and smiled.
"Our little girl is coming." She teared up.
I smiled nervously.
"Don't worry, everything's going to be okay. Well for you, I've been here 5 hours now." She giggled.
The midwife came in and did some check ups on Katherine.
"Okay, 6cm dilated four more to go!" She grinned.
"Thank god" Katherine sighed.
"I'll come back soon." The midwife left.

It was about two hours after the midwife had checked up on Katherine and Natasha had gone home, especially since it was now 3am. Katherine was in more pain now so she sent me to go find the midwife.
"Excuse me?" I patted her on the back.
"Yes?"
"Katherine watts, shes in a lot of pain now."
"Okay I'll be with you in a moment."
I walked back to the room to find Katherine screaming in agony.
"I can't do it chase!" She cried.
"It's going to be okay." She held my my hand.
The midwife came in about 10 minutes after I went to find her.
"Okay Katherine, let's have a look."
Katherine squeezed my hand, I couldn't imagine the pain she was going through right now.
" wow your already at 9cm!" The midwife announced, she sounded shocked.
"Is that okay" I asked.
"It's faster than usual but it's fine." She smiled
"Can I have the entonox!" Katherine shouted.
"Of course, deep breathes." The midwife passed her a tube that Katherine breathed through, I think it helped her with the pain.
"Okay well as soon as your at 10cm you have to start pushing." The midwife put on some gloves and a bag around her shoes. Another midwife came in with a basinet for the baby.
"Your doing amazing!" The midwife reassured her.
I didn't know what to do or what to say so I just stood there next to Katherine as she clenched on to my hand.
"Okay are you ready to push?" The midwife asked.
Oh god I thought.
Katherine pushed before letting out a moan.
"That's great, keep going." The midwife was at the bottom of the bed smiling at Katherine.
"You can do it." I smiled at her.
She didn't smile back, instead Katherine glared at me and squeezed my hand. She pushed again, this time tears escaping her eyes, she threw herself back on the bed and began to cry.
"I can't do it!" She shouted.
The midwife tried to reassure Katherine and make he push but she wouldn't.
"Katherine, if you don't push now we will have to take you into theatre." She warned her.
But Katherine didn't listen she just laid there and sobbed.
"Look at me" I turned Katherine's head so she'd face me.
"Your going to push because we both want to see our baby." I demanded, kissing her forehead.
She nodded before taking a gulp.
"Good girl" the midwife praised her as she made another push.
It felt like she was pushing for hours when finally the midwife smiled up at us both.
"She's crowning"
I smiled at Katherine, I had forgotten everything that had happened tonight, I was actually happy.
"One more big push."
Katherine held onto my hand even tighter as she made one final push.

Tiny little screams filled the room, there she was. My little girl. She was absolutely tiny, her little mouth let out such big cries. I looked at Katherine who began to cry, I had also began to tear up.
The midwife didn't let Katherine hold her straight away, instead she and another midwife took her to a station in the room to weigh her and then put her in the basinet.
"I'm really sorry, but we do need to take her to the NICU to do health checks." The midwife smiled.
"Okay, as long as she's okay." Katherine panted.
Another midwife came in to help Katherine get sorted and cleaned up, I went to get her a glass of water.
When I got back in the room Katherine was slightly sat up, her hair a mess and her face red.
"You did amazing" I passed her the glass and she took a few sips.
"Is she okay?" Katherine asked.
"I'm sure she is, the midwife will be back soon just relax." I held her hand.
"Can you call my parents?" She smiled.
I nodded and handed her the phone.
It was now 6am so there was a good chance they'd answer.
"Hey mum" She panted.
"I've had the baby" she laughed.
I left the room whilst she had the conversation, I decided I couldn't let what happened effect how I raise my child and take care of Katherine, that would be selfish of me on so many levels.

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